


The Sentimental Brave

by dontcryMasha



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abusive Parents, Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Bottom Castiel, Comforting Dean, Family Issues, M/M, Mechanic Dean, Protective Dean Winchester, Teen Castiel/Adult Dean, Teenage Castiel, Top Dean, Young Castiel
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-03
Updated: 2014-09-03
Packaged: 2018-02-11 14:22:35
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 18
Words: 39,744
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2071617
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dontcryMasha/pseuds/dontcryMasha
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Stuck as the hapless middle child, Cas struggles under the condescending glares of his parents. But one day, his luck turns around when he winds up meeting a friendly mechanic.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meeting Him

Cas was the middle child. He wasn’t Michael, the all-star college grad who had gotten into the Ivy leagues entirely on scholarships, but he also wasn’t Gabriel, the baby who would do no wrong. He was right in the center and nothing he did was ever good enough. His parents either said “Why can’t you be like Michael, and do things well?” or “Why can’t you be like Gabriel, and do things right?”

It was very conflicting because Cas tried his very best to do everything well _and_ right; when he observed others and compared his actions to them, he thought he was doing fine, but when his parents came into the picture they would instantly destroy his confidence. If he got an A in geometry, his father would fuss that it wasn’t an A in calculus. If he vacuumed the house on Saturday, his mother would say, “Why couldn’t you mop the kitchen floor, too?” It was a battle he couldn’t win, so when he got his driver’s license, he hoped that would give him more freedom. And it did. In fact, his life made some very interesting changes when he learned how to drive.

“Now that you have your full license,” his father said one day. “You can drive Michael’s old car. _But_ we want you to learn the responsibility of car ownership, so you’ll have to take it in for maintenance. I haven’t driven it for a few months and it’s going to need a basic tune-up, so before you go gallivanting all over the place, take it to the Shell at the corner and get it looked at. Keep the receipt and I’ll pay you back half of the bill.”

“Thank you,” said Cas. He didn’t feel much like thanking him, since a seventeen year old boy who made $7.25 an hour at his weekend job couldn’t really afford car repairs. But he didn’t dare talk back to his father, accepted his fate and drove the ruddy Geo Metro down to the Shell at the corner.

Talking to people was never his strong suit but he had to anyway. He forced himself to get better at it. Heart pounding, he took a space on the side and walked into the garage.

“Um, hello?” he said. Someone rattled a large drill beneath a pickup. The other lift was lowered and a big, beautiful old Chevy sat there. The hood was open and a man bent over under it. When Cas walked in and called out, the guy stood and looked over to him. He was tall, real tall, with a strong, angular face that was covered in grease. His mechanic’s uniform said _Dean_ in script over his breast. When he saw Cas, he smiled.

“Can I help you?”

“Um, hi. I need to get my car looked at.” Cas fiddled his fingers together. _Dean_ was very attractive, despite the ruddiness from work. He had short hair that was spiked just a little at the front, and his complexion was generously dotted with freckles. It was hard for Cas to look or look away.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asked, rubbing his fingers off on a towel that had been laying on the Chevy.

“Nothing? I mean, I’m not entirely sure. It hasn’t been driven for a few months and needs to be checked.”

“Oh, alright. But it’s not acting funny? Starting up alright? Due for an oil change?”

“I don’t…know.”

Dean laughed. “You don’t know?” Cas shook his head.

“My father said I had to.”

“Ahh, alright. Hey, I’ll check it out. How old is it?”

“Ten years.”

“Sure. Which car?”

Dean took a few steps out of the garage and peered around the lot.

“The Geo,” said Cas.

“Oh, yeah. I’ve seen this guy before. I’m guessing that was your brother driving it.”

“I think so.”

“Michael Novak?”

“Yes, that’s him.”

Cas followed Dean very shyly as they walked to the car. The mechanic looked at the tires, then reached in through the window, popped the hood and checked the fluids. “Looks like it’s doing just fine,” he said.

“Oh?” Cas asked. He wasn’t sure how to talk to this man, so he just stood there with his hands together, kicking at the ground.

Dean bent over as he checked the oil, grunting to himself a little. Then he got up, slammed the hood and wiped off his fingers. He turned to Cas and smiled. “I never had trouble with it before,” he said. “Looks like you’re good to go. But what happened to your brother?”

“Oh, he’s in school. They bought him a new car for that.”

“Nice.”

“I guess. Um, do you think this is a safe car to drive?”

“Yeah, why wouldn’t it be?”

Cas cleared his throat. Dean stared at him with such genuine kindness that it threw him off. Sure, Cas had a couple friends at school, but in general they remained _school_ friends and didn’t associate with him in the real world. He didn’t get out much and he preferred not to socialize, so most of the people he talked with were his parents and they were never nice to him. To have a man like Dean; handsome, strong, and older treat him like he was a wonderful person felt interesting. Very interesting.

“It’s old.”

“Old cars can be good. See my Baby in there?” Dean pointed to the Chevy in the garage.

“Is it yours?”

“Heck yeah it is. I’ve had her for fourteen years and she runs like a champ. I’ve put a lotta money into her, though.”

“Wow,” said Cas. “She looks..amazing!”

“Thanks, bud. She’s my pride and joy. But hey, tell me something.”

“Hm?” Cas turned to Dean and forced himself to look up at him. Dean had green eyes hiding behind all of the grease, grim and freckles. He smiled at Cas.

“Did your old man make you take the car here alone?”

Cas nodded. “Responsible car ownership.”

“He give you money for it?”

“No, but I need a receipt so he’s going to pay back half.”

Dean furrowed his brow. “What?”

“He’s going to pay back half of the bill.”

“Hope you don’t mind me asking, but are you working?”

“Part time, yes.”

“Okay. Well, lucky for you, I’m not gonna charge you for the little peek I had today.”

Cas blushed. “Thank you.”

“Don’t mention it. But do you want me to write up a receipt anyway?”

“Um, what? Why?”

Dean laughed a little, the skin around his eyes creasing. “So your pops will give you extra money. C’mere.” He headed into the office and Cas followed cautiously. Inside, a desk covered with papers and a small clearing for the register. Rows of cigarettes and cigars lined the wall underneath the window.

“I couldn’t possibly cheat my father like that.”

Dean went around the counter and took out a receipt pad from a drawer. He clicked a pen open and began to scribble something down anyway. “Really not?” he asked.

“Well, it just, what if he found out?”

“How?”

“I’m not sure, but he’s my father and he always finds out.”

Dean looked up at Cas and frowned. “How old are you?”

“Seventeen.”

“Oh, okay. So you’re still under his roof.”

“Yes.”

“Alright, well here it is anyway,” Dean said, brandishing the itemized receipt. Cas took it very gently. “In case you change your mind, you have it, and you have my word that I’ll back you up. Why not, right? It doesn’t hurt anyone.”

“Thank you, I guess,” said Cas. He folded the receipt several times, nervously, biting his lower lip.

“You’re due for an oil change in three months. Come back and see me.”

“Okay,” Cas hummed. He crunched the receipt up in his fist and slowly back out of the office.

“What’s your name by the way?”

“Cas.”


	2. Fantasy

He faced a major conflict now; if Cas didn’t present a receipt to his father, he would assume he lied about taking the car in, but he also thought it was wrong to cheat him. He chose the lesser of two evils and decided to show him the receipt.

“Jesus Christ, Cas. How do you manage to rack up the highest bill possible?”

“I don’t know. I’m sorry.”

Cas’ father shot him a glare beneath his heavy eyelids. “You should be,” he muttered, reaching into his wallet to hand him a twenty dollar note. Even though Dean had written up a bill for fifty-six dollars, Cas didn’t protest with the amount he got. He didn’t _dare._

“Thank you,” he said instead, taking the money gratefully before going upstairs to his room. Crumpling the bill in his hand, he flopped on his bed, stared at the ceiling and thought about Dean.

Cas guessed he was in his thirties. Everything about him was so wonderful and perfect and amazing and wow. Cas closed his eyes and held both of his hands to his chest.

Was he married? Did he have kids? Did he ever go to college? Was he doing what he wanted with his life? Then the dirtier thoughts came; how often did he get laid? How big was his dick? What did he like to do in bed? What kind of women did he like? Did he possibly like men? What would he do with Cas?

_What would he do to Cas?_

Would he run his big hands all over Cas’ body, feeling and teasing the skin? Would he kiss his flesh in sensitive spots, checking for the places he would moan the loudest and be tender? Or would he grab him, throw him, claim him roughly?

Cas didn’t know. He was still a virgin, after all. He had never even been kissed. His parents knew that he preferred men when they were going through the browser history on his laptop once, and after months of berating and being told he was “confused” and “didn’t know what he wanted,” he retreated into solitude and never pursued a relationship.

That didn’t stop him from dreaming, though. He would often lie in bed and imagine what I would be like to have a boyfriend. He’d smooth his hands down his body, run his fingers through the hair he kept neatly trimmed for nobody but himself, then grab and paw at his balls. He liked to dip his fingertips in a jar of Vaseline and tease the outside of his pucker hole. Sometimes he would dip inside and inch or so, gasping and whispering, ashamedly, “I love you.”

He wanted someone to say that to him. He wanted someone to feel it for him. His parents wouldn’t even use that word so he convinced himself that nobody would. In fact, his father often said nobody would. “You’ll just be a fag and if you’re lucky get used for sex.”

Cas came up with an excuse to see Dean again, and buying gas was perfect. He would need to eventually and his parents _definitely_ wouldn’t give him money for it, so he could use what little cash he had to fill up early. So a couple days of school rolled by without any big deal then he went to the Shell station to get ten bucks worth of cash.

Nervous as usual, he held the money in his fist and stepped into the office. There was nobody inside, but the moment the doorbell chimed, Dean came in from the garage and smiled big when he saw Cas.

“Well hey, buddy. Everything alright?”

“Yes,” Cas said softly. He blushed immediately upon seeing Dean and his beautiful, ruggedly handsome face.

“Car doing good?” Dean asked.

“Yes. I just need gas. Um, ten dollars on pump…” Cas turned back to check where the car was parked. “Five.”

“Good deal,” said Dean. He silently motioned over to the register as he walked behind it. Cas took a couple steps and held the money out to him. Dean took it and their thumbs touched. “Thanks.”

“R-right.”

“How’s your father treating you?”

Cas looked down. “Fine.”

“Sure?”

“Yes.”

The register pinged open and Dean stuck the cash inside it. “I’m not one to pry, and I know it ain’t my business, but I got the feeling your folks don’t exactly treat you with the respect you deserve.”

“What do you mean?”

Dean shrugged. “It was just a hunch. Don’t worry about it.”

“Alright.”

“You might wanna get that gas pumped before it times out,” Dean said, acting a little awkward. He appeared to be ashamed of his assumption. Cas went to leave the office, but just before he opened the door he looked back.

“Oh, um, Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“I suppose you’re right,” Cas muttered. “My parents…my parents are occasionally dismissive of me.”

“I thought so,” Dean said more confidently. He went around from the counter and stepped right up to Cas, folding his arms. “A guy that lets his kid go by himself to get his car looked at for the first time, then won’t even pay for it up front kinda sounds like a dick.”

“I wouldn’t say my father is a dick,” Cas said quietly. His eyes looked from side to side. Dean came so close to him, it was strange to be next to someone you’ve fantasized about.

“Hey, sorry,” Dean apologized. “My fault. I’m sure he’s a decent fella, maybe just not the best father. Mine wasn’t so hot either.”

Cas didn’t answer. He frowned slightly and sighed.

“He probably doesn’t realize how great of a kid he’s got,” Dean smiled sweetly.

“Oh,” Cas said, gasping a little. “He does. It just isn’t me.”

“You have siblings?”

“Two, both brothers.”

“No kidding? Me, too.” Dean grinned big enough to show his pearly whites, sparkling like stars in contrast with his greasy face. “Younger?”

“One of them.”

“That’s cool.”

“I guess. They—my parents that is, tend to favor them over me.”

“Sheesh,” Dean said, his grin fading. “That’s shitty.”

“I-I suppose. Um, but I should pump my gas before it times out, right?”

“Oh, yeah. Yeah, you should. Actually let me make sure it hasn’t, how’s that sound?”

“Okay…”

Cas continued on his way out of the door and Dean followed, holding it open for him before he could. They walked to pump five and Dean went around to check it. He barely checked it, then unscrewed the gas cap on Cas’ car and put the pump into it. Cas stood there and watched him, pressing his lips together as Dean’s strong shoulder blades stretched and pulled at his navy uniform. He turned around to face Cas and leaned against the car casually.

“How’s that? Full service and everything.”

“Th-thank you, Dean.”

“Don’t mention it. So tell me, you must be graduating soon, yeah?”

“Yes. This June.”

“That’s exciting. Any plans for school?”

“No.”

“Not at all?”

“My parents expect me to get into Cornell, but I don’t think I have the credentials.”

The pump shut off and Dean put it away. He screwed the cap back on and shut the flap, then faced Cas again. “Do you wanna go to college?”

“I’m not sure,” Cas said. He tensed his thighs a little. “Honestly I haven’t thought about it very much.”

“But you’re gonna move out of your parents’ place?”

“I would like to. I’m not sure how.”

“You will. Got any friends that are moving out?”

“I have a few, but we don’t talk much outside of school. I wouldn’t consider them close enough to make long terms plans after graduation.”

Dean frowned. “Seriously? Someone like you? I’d expect you’d have tons of friends begging you to live with ‘em.”

“Ohh,” Cas blushed. “Um, I suppose…thank you.”

“Don’t be so shy.” Dean lightly rapped his fist on Cas’ shoulder, winked and went back towards the shop. “Come back and fill up sometime.”

Cas stood there and said nothing. He held his breath. His wide eyes followed Dean’s muscular body as it carried him to the garage and disappeared inside.


	3. I Just Want to Make a Pie

“You should be lucky that you could have my old one.”

“That’s true.”

Cas was trying to complete his homework, but a call from his older brother distracted him. He mentioned that it was difficult for him to pay for the gas and basic maintenance of the car.

“I think you’re whining too much,” said Michael.

“I’m sorry.”

“Yeah, you _should_ be.” He so clearly parroted their father. “Put mom on the phone.”

“She and father went out.”

“Oh, okay. Well tell them to float me some more cash when they get back. Rent coming up.”

“I will.”

“’Kay bye.”

The other end hung up and Cas set the phone back onto the receiver. He sighed, took the pencil he had left on the counter then went back upstairs. Gabriel was in his room, playing loud video games on the TV he got for his birthday and taking advantage of a parentless evening, but Cas thought nothing of it and walked on by. His room was practically barren; a bookshelf, a minimalist desk, his twin-sized bed and a short dresser. Whenever he bought new clothes, his mom would make him get rid of three others before he could put them away. It wasn’t an entirely foolish idea, but he had so few clothes to begin with, he ended being reduced to only a couple outfits each season.

So he sat back at his desk and returned to the history assignment. It was boring. Cas liked to study and he was interested in school, but he felt tired and bored today. He wanted to see Dean. In his head, he would have short daydreams where he’d run up to Dean and confess his feelings for him, then the man would agree and they’d embrace. It was stupid, though; even if Dean _did_ like him, his parents would never let them be together. And besides, Dean would likely only use him for sex.

* * *

It came time to buy another few gallons of gas, which was Cas’ new favorite time of the week. It broke up the monotony of school and work nicely, but still set him on edge. He would spend the entire week planning and plotting each movement, word and expression he would make with Dean.

“‘How are you, Dean?’ No, no…”

Cas spoke aloud to himself as his Geo putted down the road home. He shook his head sadly.

“‘Did you miss me?’ No, no!”

He banged on the steering wheel. That was stupid! Dean was so much older and probably married or at least had a girl to go home to. The last thing the mechanic wanted to deal with was some nerdy little high school boy. Cas cleared his throat and decided he would take the simple approach.

“‘Hello, Dean.’”

Yes, of course! It was perfect. A greeting that was personalized to him. How could that go wrong? With a smile on his face, he pulled up to the gas station and went inside the office. Feeling confident, he readied himself but unfortunately found a much older man sitting behind the counter. A dirty baseball cap covered most of his face, the rest was hidden by a beard and a ruddy Chilton repair manual. His nametag, beat up from years upon years of use, read _Bobby_.

“Can I help ya?” he grunted when Cas came in. The young man flushed. He was caught off guard. What to do!?

“Um, i-is Dean here?”

“’Fraid not. He wasn’t feelin’ too well today so he decided not ta’ come in.”

“O-oh. Is…is he alright?”

“Yeah, he’ll be fine.” Bobby raised his eyes above the big book. “You his son or somethin’?”

Cas inhaled sharply all of the sudden. “Um, no!” He gasped, eyes widening greatly. But Bobby chuckled and closed the book. “He, I’m not, I—“

“Relax, kid,” said Bobby. “I know y’ain’t old enough to be his son.”

“He has—he has a son?”

“I’m just teasin’. Dean’s gonna be back tomorrow.”

“Oh…”

“Ya’ makin’ him a pie?”

“I’m sorry?”

Bobby got up from his chair, which creaked a couple times, then walked over to Cas with his hands in his pockets. “Ya’ makin’ him a pie?”

“No, why?”

“Ev’ry time th’ guy gets sick, one of his little guys comes ‘round and brings him a pie.”

Cas blinked. What was this man talking about? Was it appropriate to ask? Well, he brought it up so why not? He shifted on his heels, tightened his knees and asked, “What do you mean, little guys?”

“Aw, heck if I know. Been damned near three years since he’s called out. Dunno what he’s up to these days. But y’know how he is about pie.”

Bobby kept muttering to himself as he walked right by Cas and towards the door to the car bays. Cas furrowed his brow as he watched him.

“No, I don’t?”

“Loves his pie, loves his pie.” Bobby continued to talk but went right on through the door and out of Cas’ range. He had many questions now, but the first one on my his mind was if he should bring Dean a pie or not. Bobby certainly wasn’t vague about that.

Instead of buying gas, Cas drove to the grocery store and got some apples. He knew that there would be enough ingredients at home for the rest, provided nobody would stop him. Feeling excited but wary of Bobby’s “little guys” comment, Cas held his head up high and got home to start baking.

He mixed the dough, pressed it into a pan, prepared the apples as necessary then put them inside. He cut strips of the top crust to make a lattice and then put it in the oven. The whole thing took him some considerable time, since he had never baked before. He spilled flour, he got dough on his shirt, he kept getting eggshells stuck in the whites when he cracked them. It was frustrating but he managed alright. While he waited for it to bake, his mother came home from work and, upon seeing the mess in the kitchen, went ballistic.

“WHAT IS ALL THIS IN HERE?!” she yelled. Cas tensed up in his seat at the table and said nothing. “DID YOU GET PERMISSION TO COOK?! DID YOU…IS THAT MY FLOUR?! HAVE YOU BEEN USING MY FLOUR?!”

“I-I’m sorry.”

“SORRY ISN’T GOOD ENOUGH, CASTIEL!” She dropped her purse on the ground and stepped heavily with her heels to the sink, staring down at the pans he had soaking. “This mess…this mess…this mess! What are you even making?!”

“A pie.”

“ _Why_ are you making a pie?!”

“For a friend.”

His mother thinned her lips and shot a heated look back at him, arms akimbo. “So now you’re just using my pans and ingredients to make pies for friends?”

“I’m sorry, mother.”

She shook her head. “You better be sorry.”

“I am.”

Cas’ mom then walked to the oven, opened it up and stared at the pie. She kept shaking her head as she grabbed up a pot holder and pulled the pie out.

“It still needs ten more minutes,” Cas said softly.

“No,” his mother replied. She set the pie on the counter, picked up a fork and poked into it. “This crust is a mess and there’s too much sugar, I can tell just by looking at it.” She blew on the tines of the fork then tasted it and made a gross face. “You aren’t going to make friends by baking like _this_.”

“It was my first attempt.”

His mother sighed loud and put the fork down, then she grabbed up the pie, walked to the trash can and dumped it all out. Cas watched in silent horror. Steam rose up from the trash and his eyes welled up just as hotly.

“Well it’s shit,” said his mom. She tossed the pan into the sink, told him to “clean it all up.”

“But…”

“Cas, it’s shit. I’m doing you a favor. Stop baking. Clean up your mess, it’s making me sick. I just want to come home to a clean kitchen, is that too much to ask?”

Cas began to cry. He got up and, feeling so strange on the inside, went to the sink to start cleaning.

“For Christ’s sake,” his mother barked, looking at him in sheer disbelief. “How can you call yourself a man? A human? Crying like that over nothing. The pie was horrible. If you give that to your friend, they’ll probably beat you up.”

Cas did everything he could to suck up his sniffles but it wouldn’t work. He was a week from turning 18 and yet his mother’s shrill voice and harsh words still reduced him to tears. It was so emasculating.

“Well, you certainly live up to your name,” his mother said as she walked out of the kitchen, sucking her teeth and glaring at Cas as if he was diseased. “The angel of tears.”


	4. It's a Date?

 Cas stared at the pile of pie in the trashcan until it steamed no more. It was probably stupid to make Dean something, anyway. It would give him the wrong idea. Cas decided that his mother was right after all.

But he still needed gas, so on his way home from school the next day, he reluctantly went by. Now he didn’t even _want_ to see Dean since he was embarrassed that all of pie making had ever happened. But Dean didn’t have to know about any of it.

After he parked at a pump and began to go towards the office, ten dollar note clutched in his hand, Dean popped out of one of the open bays and waved.

“Hey!”

Cas stopped in his tracks and looked right at him. Oh, Dean. He missed that face. So rugged yet soft, perfect and mmmm perfect. Cas grabbed them bottom hem of his own t-shirt and blushed heavily, crinkling the money as he tugged. It felt like forever since he had seen him.

“H-Hello, Dean,” Cas said softly. Dean walked right up to him and flashed a big, bright smile.

“How’ve you been?”

“Good…you? You were sick yesterday?”

Dean rolled his eyes. “Hung over, but don’t tell Bobby.”

“Ohhh.”

Then it was good he didn’t make a pie. A flaky, sugary pastry is the last thing someone wants after recovering from a hangover. But he still had questions, and a lot of them.

“How is everything?” Dean asked, smiling amicably.

“Um,” Cas hummed to himself. He suddenly started to fidget, mind racing. As his eyes looked Dean up and down quickly, drinking in his strong upper body, thick, built arms and lean bowlegs, he suddenly spat out the words, “IWASGOINGTOMAKEYOUAPIE!”

“Haah, what?” Dean blushed softly and blinked a few times. “A pie? Make me a pie?”

“Y-yes.” A hot sheet of embarrassment smacked Cas in the face and he regretted what he said all at once. His eyes closed and his head turned away.

“That’s awesome. Not to sound like a dick, but why didn’t you?”

“It wasn’t any good.”

“Aww, hey, I’m sure it was.”

Cas took a few steps backwards. “N-no, it wasn’t. I’m sorry!” Then he ran back to his car, dropping the money to the ground.

“Hey!” Dean yelled. He bent down, snatched the cash then jogged up to the Geo. “What gives? You dropped this.”

Cas covered his face with both of his hands. “I’m sorry.”

“Dude, you gotta stop apologizing so much. There’s no reason for it. I’m not mad at you, do you think I am?”

“N-no.”

“Hey, hey…look at me.”

Dean put a hand very gently on Cas’ shoulder and delicately tried to turn him. Cas melted at the touch and followed his lead. As his fingers dropped away from his face, Cas looked up at Dean and nearly swooned. This close to him, he could practically count the freckles. He could make constellations out of them. _F_ _aciem_ _I_ _ncredibile_. How silly.

“I feel like there’s more you wanna say to me but you’re afraid to.”

Cas gulped. “Um…”

Dean wet his lips with his tongue and Cas tried to avoid looking at it. He turned his head and leaned in a little closer to Cas, all the while his big hand remained on his shoulder.

“Are your parents abusive?”

“N-no,” Cas said quickly. “They never hit.”

“Abuse can be verbal, Cas.”

Softly, Cas looked down and said, “I know.”

“Do you want to talk about this with me?”

Cas nodded. He tried not to cry. Nobody had _ever_ asked him if his parents were mean to him. It touched him profoundly. “Not here…” he muttered.

“Yeah, that’s fine, I get it. How about we go get ice cream or something when my shift is up?”

“Um…”

Dean got a little flustered. He let off of Cas’ shoulder. “Or not, sorry. We don’t have to. Ugh, man I’m sorry I even asked, don’t worry about it.”

“No,” said Cas. “I want to. Wh-when do you get off?”

A soft chuckle and Dean sighed in relief. “Five. Do you want me to pick you up?”

“My parents will get mad.”

“How old are you again?”

“Seventeen.”

“And you’ve never had someone pick you up? Ever?”

“Only my parents.”

“Look, I don’t want to pressure you and you’re free to make your own decisions…but, that exactly; you’re free to make your own decisions.”

Cas grimaced. What would they do if some older man came to pick him up? What would they say? “I’d prefer to meet you somewhere. Or, or what if I leave my car here? And then we can drive together.”

Dean smiled. “Sure, Cas. Let’s do that. Whatever makes you comfortable.”

So they did just that; a few minutes before five o’clock, Cas took the car back out and drove to the gas station. He told his father that he had to work on a project with a classmate. Since it was school related, his father really couldn’t argue much about that and sent him on his way. “Be home by seven,” was all he said.

Cas parked his car in one of the spaces along the far end of the gas station and sat there for a moment. Was this a date? No, no it certainly was not. Dean was just his mechanic, who seemed to have a keen interest in the relationship with his parents. He probably looked at Cas as if he was a younger brother or a kid; someone he could help out.

After a minute to pull himself together and muster up some courage, Cas took a couple deep breaths then got out of his car. He heard an engine roar and warble from within the garage, and then that sleek, old black Chevy came backing out. It turned around and pulled up right alongside Cas with the passenger’s door facing him. Dean leaned across the seat and grinned at Cas. “Right on time! Hop in.”

Cas nodded nervously and got inside. The door was so heavy and it slammed with a satisfying embrace, then he sat down on the leather seats and clacked the belt around his lap. It smelled musky and delightful.

“You like classics?” Dean asked. He reached for the radio and honestly Cas wasn’t sure if he meant cars or music.

“Um. Yes? I suppose so.” His hands sat in his lap and he looked out of the window. AC/DC played over the speakers.

“Haha cool, that’s cool. So where do you wanna go?” Dean palmed the steering wheel and pulled out of the gas station, hopping up on the road and giving it some gas. The engine lurched and roared happily.

“Um. Ice…cream?”

“Sure. You got any favorite places?”

Cas shook his head. “I’ve never gone out for ice cream.”

“Wait, seriously?”

Dean turned the volume on the radio down all the way. “You’ve _never_ gone out for ice cream?”

“No…” Cas scrunched up his forehead thinking he did something wrong. His shoulders pushed together. “I’m sorry.”

“Why sorry?”

“I-I don’t know.”

“Cas, Cas. You need to relax. I’m not judging you, okay? It’s just unusual that you’ve never gone out for ice cream. When you were a kid, your parents never did it as a reward?”

“No. They don’t like me to have many sweets. They said it made me too hyper.”

“You? Too hyper? If you ask me, I think you aren’t hyper enough.”

“I don’t know,” Cas answered quickly. They drove by a grocery store and a couple restaurants.

“Man. What else have you missed out on?”

“I _wouldn’t_ know.”

Dean smiled at Cas weakly, but the young man was still looking out of the window and didn’t notice. He took them to a little strip mall that had a Haagen-Dazs on one end. Cas stared.

“R-really?”

“What?” Dean parked pretty far from the other cars then shut off the engine. He stared at Cas curiously. “What?”

“I’ve never had Haagen-Dazs.”

“Seriously!? Holy shit. Come on.”

Dean hopped out of the car and went around to Cas’ side, but he had already opened the door and gotten out. He looked Dean over and smiled to himself. The mechanic’s blues were gone and he now had snug jeans and an army green t-shirt on. The sleeves were shorter and tighter than the uniform, and Cas saw the bottom of a tattoo on his left arm, but he didn’t ask about it.

“Come on,” Dean repeated. He went ahead towards the store, motioning for Cas to follow. The young man dashed up alongside him and smiled.

“Thank you,” he muttered.

“Huh? For what?”

“Taking me here.”

“Life owes this to you.”

Dean went up to the ice cream parlor and held the door open for Cas. He stepped through and blushed a little. Part of him felt kind of like a woman, and he enjoyed that. In his head, he saw himself as a cute young lady that Dean was trying to woo. Oh, daydreams.

“Get whatever you want,” said Dean. He walked up to the counter and stared at the menu for a second, then ordered some kind of shake. Cas didn’t pay all that much attention to it since he was trying to figure out what he would get. So many decisions…

“A single scoop of vanilla,” he said softly to the clerk. Dean looked at him and chuckled.

“Really? That’s all?”

“I’m a little scared to try anything too different.”

“Eh,” Dean remarked with a shrug. “It’s all good, anyway. You won’t be disappointed no matter what you get.”

Dean was handed a cup of something chocolaty, topped with whipped cream and then they got Cas his little scoop. Dean gave the guy behind the counter some cash and they went to find a seat. It was surprisingly empty, just two other people sat inside.

Cas took a chair near the window and put a tiny spoonful into his mouth. He closed his eyes, blushed and murmured a sweet, “oooh…”

“Is it good?” Dean asked, watching Cas intently.

“Ooh…ooh it is. It’s very sweet. Very rich. Mm…”

“Try this,” suggested Dean, holding out his shake. Cas was apprehensive at first, but he leaned over and took the straw in his mouth and sucked. He noticed that Dean was watching him with big eyes and he only sucked in a little bit.

“I-it’s good,” Cas hummed. He licked his lips. Dean stared with his mouth open just barely. “Thank you.”

“Glad you like it,” Dean said. “So, tell me about your parents.”

“I think they’re good people,” said Cas. He took another slow spoonful of ice cream and contemplated his family. “But, but I suppose they can be overbearing.”

“Can I ask you something?” Dean said between sucks.

“Yes.”

“Did one of them tell you the pie was bad?”

Cas looked hurt suddenly. He set the spoon down and stared at the table, eyes wiggling sadly.

“Hey, hey,” Dean cooed. “It’s okay. Was I right?” Cas nodded painfully. “Cas…”

“I tried very hard to make it,” Cas whined. “But my mother came home and said it was _shit_. She threw it away before I had even seen what it looked like.”

“Cas…”

“She said I would never make friends if I gave them pies of that quality.”

“Cas…”

“And she told me not to bake.”

“ _Cas_ …”

A tear pressed out between Cas’ eyelids and he peered up at Dean, who looked like he might even cry, too. He offered his shake out to Cas again but he refused it.

“They aren’t very nice to you,” said Dean.

Reluctantly, Cas nodded and whispered, “I know.”

“You gotta get away from them.”

“I don’t know how.”

“How much longer are you seventeen?”

“A week.”

“That all?”

“Mmm.”

“That’s not so bad. It’ll be okay.”

Cas stared at the ice cream that was starting to melt in its cup. He took his spoon and swished it around sadly.

“You don’t want anymore?” Dean asked in a soft voice. Cas shook his head. “That’s okay. It’s fine. You’ll be fine.”

“I don’t know,” Cas sighed. He looked at Dean again and sniffed loudly. “They’re very much in love with my brothers, but for some reason they don’t like me.”

“Well I like you. That’s gotta count for something, right?”

Cas smiled though his eyes remained warm and red. “I think so.”

“Look, here…” Dean took his phone out from his pocket and set it on the table. “You have a cell?”

“Yes.”

“What’s your number?”

Cas told Dean his digits in a small voice, looking at the other people in the store suspiciously. His parents always talked about identity theft and he was pretty much terrified anybody could use anything of his to steal it and ruin his life.

“Okay,” said Dean. “I’ll send you a text so you can store my number. If they give you a hard time or you need to get away for whatever reason, let me know. I’ll be there.”

Cas nodded. “Thank you.”

“Yeah don’t mention it.” Dean put his phone away and got up. “Ready?”

“Yes.”

“I’ll just take you back to the gas station now, yeah?”

“Yes. Thank you.”

Cas smiled at Dean just a little and they head out. They listened to another classic rock song on the ride home and Dean sang along so bad and loud that Cas couldn’t help but laugh. He blushed a bit and smiled genuinely.

“Here’s your stop, buddy,” Dean said. He pulled up next to the Geo and motioned to it with his chin.

“Thank you, Dean,” Cas hummed. Part of him wanted to give him a hug, but he kept to himself. A brief moment of awkwardness froze them both, but Cas just got out of the car and ended it then and there. He waved like a dumbass and Dean grinned like a dumbass before driving away, then Cas got in his car and hugged himself instead. Ice cream was good but Dean was better. He looked down at his phone and kept reading the text over and over; “This is Dean : ) Text me if ur blue.”


	5. New Experiences

“If I’m blue. Text me if I’m blue.”

Cas repeated the text a lot. He went home and curled up in bed, still reading it to himself. The light was off but his phone was on, shining brightly in his face.

“Text me if you’re blue. I’m not blue, Dean. I won’t text you.”

He smiled and hugged himself. He had Dean’s phone number. Did that mean Dean liked him like that? No, probably not. It was Dean being a nice guy; Dean taking Cas under his wing like a mentor.

It didn’t take long for Cas’ father to realize he was still up. Without even knocking on the door, he came inside and asked loudly, “Why are you awake?”

“I can’t sleep,” said Cas. He turned the screen off of his phone and held it low.

“Where were you?”

“I was out with a friend.”

“A friend? Who’s this _friend_?”

“Someone I met.”

His father snorted. “Oh,” he sighed. “When of _those_ friends…great.”

“I don’t know, father.”

“Well it’d be nice if you actually told us that you were ‘going out’ with a ‘friend.’”

“I’m sorry.”

“You should be. And don’t ‘go out’ with anybody else unless you ask for permission.”

“I will. I’m sorry.”

Cas’ father grumble to himself as he walked out, slamming his door loudly. Cas jumped then hugged his phone again. It was almost like hugging Dean. Oh, Dean. He wanted to be with him so badly. Was it appropriate to text him? Did this count as being blue?

Trembling, Cas looked at the screen and typed out “Hello, Dean.” Almost immediately he had a response.

“Hey Cas. U ok?”

“Yes.”

Cas thought that was a stupid answer. It was far too brief.

“Whats up?”

“My parents are mad that I went out.”

“Screw em.”

“It’s not that easy.”

“I know srry. Don’t let em get to u.”

“I need to ask permission for the next time I go out.”

“Jeez. Ur almost an adult.”

“Yes but not yet.”

“Soon. Wat r u doin for ur birthday?”

“Nothing.”

“Srsly?”

“I never do. When I was little they used to buy me a cake and sometimes give me a present, but not anymore.”

“Ok so were going out.”

Cas stared at the message and blinked a few times. It was difficult to figure out what he should write back.

“Okay…”

“Nething you wanna do?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Dinner and a movie?”

“I don’t think I should be out that late.”

“Alright. How bout dinner tomorrow, movie on ur bday?”

Cas blushed in the darkness of his room. “Okay,” he wrote, and then followed it up with “thank you.”

* * *

The next day was impossibly long. School dragged on _forever_. A thirty minute movie in psychology felt lie three hundred, and a quiz in science was endless. It seemed that Cas couldn’t steady his breathing no matter how hard he tried to calm down; he would going out with Dean tonight. Dinner. Dinner with Dean. Where would they go? It was a surprise.

But the one thing Cas wasn’t going to mess up was getting permission. When he came home from school, finally, the first thing he did was tell his father he was going out.

“Where? With who?”

“Dinner, and with a friend.”

“What friend?”

Cas ran a comb through his messy hair and looked away from his father. “A friend.”

“Don’t give me those crappy answers, Castiel,” his father hissed. “What friend? Since when do you have friends?”

Those words hurt. For a moment, he nearly wanted to cancel his plans with Dean because of that. Why was it so especially painful when his father insulted him like that?

“Dean. That’s his name.”

“ _Dean?_ So it _is_ some guy. Where did you meet him?”

Cas cleared his throat. “D-does it matter?”

“Yes it does. Where did you meet him?”

“School…”

His father knew he was lying. He pressed his lips together, glared at Cas then walked away. “Don’t be out past nine.”

“Yes.”

He finished combing his hair then smoothed out the t-shirt he was wearing. Since he had no idea where Dean was taking him, he assumed that a nice shirt and jeans would be fine. If getting ice cream felt like it _might_ be a date, then going out for dinner certainly seemed like it truly was. Cas had butterflies. So many butterflies.

Then it was six o’clock on the nose and he thought he should wait out front for Dean, so that the man didn’t have to come inside. He slipped through the front door and saw that the Chevy was already parked on the street. A smile stretched over Cas’ face and he went running towards it.

“Dean!” he shouted, overwhelmed with the joy of seeing him.

“Heeey, nice to see you too, buddy!”

Cas hopped inside quickly and strapped the seatbelt. “Hello.”

“Hi. How are ya?”

“Good,” Cas said with a nod. Dean smiled and glanced over at him briefly.

“You look cute,” he said.

“Oh,” Cas inhaled, blushing. “I-I do?”

“Yeah. So where to?”

“It doesn’t matter. You can decide.”

“Alrighty, can do.”

The car took off down the road, radio blaring loudly. It was actually too loud for Cas but he didn’t want to say anything, so he smiled anyway, just happy to be alone with Dean and away from his family.

“Figure out what movie you wanna see for your birthday?” Dean asked.

“No, I’m really not sure.”

“Okay, no problem. Hey, let’s go here, how’s that sound?” He pulled into the parking lot that had a few places. “You like sushi?”

“I’ve never had it.”

“What!? You’ve never had sushi?!”

“Um, no. Is that okay?”

Dean laughed as he took a space. “Of course it’s okay. Everything about you is okay…do you like fish?”

“Yes.”

“Would you eat it raw?”

“That sounds interesting.”

“Heheh alright, let’s try it.”

They both got out of the car and went in to the sushi place. It was a quaint, quiet little restaurant tucked into the corner of the strip. The walls were beige and soft Japanese music played in the background.

“This looks nice,” Cas said quietly as they walked inside. “Have you been here before?”

“Yeah, couple times.”

They snatched a seat in a far corner, away from the couple other tables that were full. Cas sat and looked at Dean shyly. The man had on a plaid shirt that was tucked into his pants, and the top few buttons were down to show he had some other kind of shirt on beneath it. His skin was nice and clean, showing off all of those freckles. When he took up the menu, Cas saw that they weren’t just on his face, but his hands, too. Oh God, how he wanted to touch those hands.

“Get whatever you want,” said Dean, browsing the menu. “Even if it’s expensive, which it all is. Don’t worry about it.”

“Thank you,” Cas mumbled quietly. He hadn’t noticed the prices, but once Dean pointed it out he felt guilty. Either way, one of the bento combinations seemed nice. A lot of the items he didn’t understand but it would at least be an experience if he tried them.

“Do you mind if I get a beer?” Dean asked.

“No. Why?”

“Well I am driving. Thought I should ask you first.”

“I don’t think one beer should make a difference, right?”

“Nope.”

Their waitress came by and gave them water, then Dean got a beer and Cas wanted a ginger ale. Having a soda was special. His parents said they were bad for him, but they also said that ice cream was and ice cream ended up being delicious. When the soda came, he took a big sip and smiled, blushing.

“How is it?” Dean chuckled.

“Very sweet. It’s good. Have you had ginger ale before?”

“Yeah of course.”

“Mmmm,” Cas hummed, grinning almost. He took another long sip. “It’s lovely.”

“You’re very easy to please, you know that?”

Cas laughed quietly. “Am I?”

“Yeah, like…the simplest little thing is a big deal to you. It’s nice. I like it.”

“Thank you.”

After they put in their orders, a few quick minutes of mindless banter went on and the food then arrived. Cas was startled by how many different things were on his plate, neatly tucked into parts that were sectioned off by either the shape of the dish or thin strips of plastic grass.

“Ohh my,” he said, looking at it all. Dean ordered something similar, but it had more slabs of raw fish in it.

“It’s good, try it,” said Dean. He grabbed a fork and began to eat, but Cas looked around and noticed most of the other patrons used chopsticks.

“What about those?” he asked. “Do you use chopsticks?”

“I’m crap at them. It doesn’t matter.”

“Oh, okay,” Cas said with a nod. He copied Dean and used a fork.

The first piece he tried was a California roll, and that was very nice. He grinned big as the different tastes went around in his mouth. Dean watched him and laughed, nursing his beer all the while. The second piece he had was a pan seared dumpling. It was good, too. In fact every single thing on his plate was wonderful. He ate a little too quickly then finished his soda.

“This was lovely,” he said, setting down his fork. Dean was almost done.

“Glad you liked it.”

“Yes, yes very much so. Oh, Dean, I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Dean glanced downwards at his food and poked the plate with the fork tines, smiling shyly. “Yeah,” he muttered. “Me, too. Hey, Cas? Can I tell you something?”

“Yes?”

“Well, maybe…okay, I’ll tell you later.”

“What?” Cas asked, cocking his head.

“Let me pay the tab first.”

He took some cash out of his wallet, left it on the black payment tray and then they left. Cas fumbled with his own fingers, watching them as they walked. “What did you want to tell me?” he asked.

Dean went to his car and got inside, shortly followed by Cas. He stuck the keys into the ignition but didn’t start it. His face looked serious and he blushed gently, lighting up the flesh under his galaxy of freckles.

“You said you were going to tell me something, right?” Cas asked.

“Yeah.”

“What?”

“I wanna kiss you.”

Cas locked up. His eyes widened and he looked away. “Oh,” he gasped softly, unsure of what to do. Did Dean really say that?”

“Sorry, sorry,” Dean said real fast. “I shouldn’t’ve said anything.”

“N-no,” Cas whispered. “It’s okay.”

“You sure?”

“Yes. I…I want to kiss you, too.”

Dean relaxed into the chair. “Okay, good,” he said. “I’m waiting until you turn eighteen. I don’t wanna get in any legal trouble.”

Cas slowly turned to Dean and bit his lower lip. “Just one kiss?” he hummed. Dean caught his look and winced.

“One kiss,” he said. “Guess one kiss can’t hurt.”

The man leaned over the seat and into Cas’ face, eyes open just barely, lips parted. He put a hand onto Cas’ right shoulder and pulled him in. Cas closed his eyes. He didn’t know what to expect. He didn’t know what would happen. In fact, he didn’t even know what to do with his mouth!

But Dean came in and planted his lips right on top of his, smacking them lightly. It was amazing. It was more than amazing. Dean had the softest, warmest, more wonderful mouth ever. Cas felt magic and sparkles and any other warm, happy sensation he could fathom rush from head to toe. His heart raced and his crotch tightened.

“Oh…” was all he could say after Dean pulled away. They stared at each other.

“That okay?” Dean whispered.

“Y-yes,” Cas agreed with a slow, rhythmic nod. “J-just one kiss can’t hurt.”


	6. Decisions

 

“I’m not gonna kiss you in front of your house,” Dean said softly. His car idled on the street.

“That’s fine,” Cas whispered, looking down at his lap. “I’ll um, talk to you later.”

“Yeah, text me.”

“I will. Thank you.”

Dean smiled. “Thank _you_ , Cas. Take care of yourself.”

Cas opened the heavy door of Dean’s car and stepped out, then slammed it and waved shyly as Dean drove away. Walking back to his house felt more like floating. His head swam and butterflies battered the insides of his stomach. Dean _was_ interested in him. He _was_. He liked Cas the same way he did and he even _kissed_ him. But the happiness was gone the moment Cas went inside.

“Who was that?” his mother’s voice asked sharply. Even though the house was dark, both of his parents were sitting on the sofa, looking out of the bay window.

“My friend,” Cas said quickly. He stepped out of his shoes and left them neatly by the door.

“How _old_ is he?” Cas’ father hissed.

“I’m not sure.”

They both stood up and cornered Cas, arms folded and brows furrowed frighteningly so in the darkness. Cas took careful, slow steps towards the staircase.

“Castiel, you did _not_ met him at school!” his mother yelled. “He’s some creep!”

“He…ah…he isn’t a creep.”

“How do you know? How long have you known him? What did you do with him?!”

Cas held his breath. “We had dinner.” He managed to get to the stairs, despite his parents glaring him down. He put one foot up on the first step and stopped.

“You’ve been whoring yourself out!” His father accused him. Oddly enough, his mother began to cry. “Look what you’re doing to your mother!”

“Our son is a slut!” She sobbed. “O-our son is a queer slut!”

He didn’t know how to respond. Such a beautiful, innocent evening had suddenly gone sour. Terrified that staying would make things worse but leaving might, too, he had no choice but had to flee. He ran upstairs and said nothing.

“Where are you going!?” his father yelled.

Cas closed his door and locked it. He pressed his back against the door and slid down, wrapping his arms around his knees to tuck them close. He cried. He cried and he cried. He was not a slut and he was certainly not whoring himself out to Dean. As far as he could tell, Dean really cared about him.

“Cas!! CAS!!” Violent rapping on the door startled him as his father began to shout once more. “This man—this pervert—he’s going to take advantage of you!!”

“No,” Cas said to himself, but it was too quiet for anybody else to hear.

“You don’t know what you want out of life! This creep is going to mess you up!”

“No!”

“How can you tell me no? You don’t understand what the real world is all about!”

Cas covered his face with his hands and sobbed harder. He began to hyperventilate.

“He’s sick! He’s preying on you! They’re all SICK, Cas! Don’t be like them!”

His father continued to yell, but soon it was stopped short when Gabriel came out of his room and complained that it was too loud. Cas’ sobs lessened so he could hear them better.

“I’m sorry, Gabe. Didn’t mean to keep you up.”

“Eehh. You did.”

“Sorry, sorry.”

“What’d Cas do?”

“He’s…oh, I’ll tell you when you’re older.”

“’Kay. You gonna be quiet so I can keep getting my beauty sleep?”

“Yes. Sorry. Good night, Gabe. Sleep well.”

“Esh.”

A door slammed then Cas’ father leaned against his again. “You aren’t allowed to see that man anymore,” he said sternly. “He’s going to corrupt you. No more, you got that?”

Cas didn’t answer. He put his head down on the floor, back along the bottom threshold and hugged himself sadly. On the other side, his father just shook his head and walked away. Cas fell asleep like that.

* * *

He didn’t text Dean the next day. He didn’t want to bother him and he didn’t want to violate his father’s rule, but one more day and it _was_ his birthday. Dean said they would go out, but how could he tell him he wasn’t allowed to?

No word from Dean until the morning of Cas’ birthday, when he received a text that said “Happy Birthday <3”

Cas stared at the message for a moment, thinning his lips and wondering what to make of it. He dressed for school, had breakfast then went on his way without writing back. What could he say? “Thank you, but we can’t see each other anymore.” That would be so rude, he couldn’t do that. But Dean had to know.

During lunch, Cas checked his phone and saw he had another message from Dean. “Everything ok?”

At that point, it was cruel to ignore Dean. He had to write back. Hesitantly, he stared at the keys for a moment that typed out, “Yes. Thank you.”

“What movie u wanna see tonite?”

Cas sighed. He groaned. He grunted. His stomach felt sick and he might throw up the burger he just ate.

“Nothing,” he typed quickly. As the message was sent, his whole body flushed cold. Kissing Dean was the greatest thing that had _ever_ happened to him, but now it was going to stop short.

“What?” Dean replied. Was it really going to go down like this? It seemed he had no other choice.

“I can’t.”

“U sick?”

“No.”

Each word hurt him. He was going to vomit.

“Ru mad at me?”

“No. My parents.”

“What they say?”

“They don’t want me to see you anymore, so we can’t go out.”

“Cas.” He stared at the message with great sadness, then a second one came in right after it. “U gonna let them run ur life?”

“I guess.”

“Ur 18 now baby.”

Baby?

Cas blushed, despite the hideousness of their text conversation.

“Don’t wanna pressure u, but tell them 2 fuck themselves and come see a good movie w me ok?”

“I don’t know.”

“Think abt it and tell me in a few hours.”

“Alright.”

Cas put his phone away and folded his arms on the table. His face went right against them and he closed his eyes. He was eighteen now. He didn’t have to listen to them. But they still gave him a roof over his head and food to eat, barely. Would it be worth it to throw that all away from a guy he barely knew?

Lunch was up before he knew it and he shuffled off to his science class. Of course he didn’t get any birthday wishes, but that was because he didn’t want anybody. Nobody knew. Even his “good friends” weren’t exactly aware, since he did such a good job of keeping to himself.

It was a shame, Cas thought, that he couldn’t enjoy the class better. Here he was just a few weeks away from the end of the year, the end of _all_ high school for him, and he couldn’t get his mind off of Dean. What next?

The taste of Dean lingered in his mouth still. Musky and sweet. For years he had dreamed of his first kiss, wondering who it would be with, where it would happen, how it would feel. If a year earlier someone had told him it’d be in a sushi restaurant parking lot with a thirty-some year old man, he wouldn’t have believed them. But that’s how it went and it was amazing. In fact, throughout the entirety of his science class he thought about nothing but that kiss. Dean has these wonderful soft lips that were just the bee’s knees. And that’s when he made his decision, right when the teacher snapped at him for ignoring her question.

“Mr. Novak!” she yelled, shaking her head playfully. “It’s like you’re in another world!”

“Hm?” Cas said as he looked up at her. His eyes glazed over and he still thought about Dean.

“Where are you?”

“Here, I believe.”

“Not mentally, you aren’t. Whatever is going on in that little head of yours had better straighten up before finals.”

“Right.”

Cas nodded and glanced at his desk once more. The notebook he had out there was nearly at the end with only four or five blank pages remaining. He had been diligent about keeping the notes organized, but today it became sloppy. He wrote a couple sentences pertaining to the day’s lesson, but then it turned into squiggles and small sentiments such as “those green eyes” and “his perfect lips.”

“His freckles are a great universe.”

“He tastes of divine things, like honey ale and stardust.”

A kid sitting next to him saw the notes and shot him a strange look, but just as they opened their mouth to make a comment, Cas said “I don’t care” with a proud smile. Then the bell rang and they were gone. Cas was the last to leave. He took his time putting everything away. The smirk didn’t leave his face, even when the remaining students pushed him around while he lined up. He still smiled as he trudged down the hall, fellow class members who looked more like seniors than he did bumping into him and thudding against his backpack. I didn’t matter. Nothing mattered. He slipped off into the bathroom real quick and, free from any nosy teachers who might confiscate it, took his phone out to write a message. He pulled up Dean’s last message and replied, “Any movie you would like.”


	7. That Moment

"Where are you going?”

While Cas stood in the bathroom, washing his face and combing his hair, clearly dressed nicely, his mother came up and poked her head inside.

“Out with some friends for my birthday,” he said quite simply.

“Which friends?”

“From school. Kevin and Jo and Charlie.”

“Since when do you go out with friends?” his mother hissed. He tried to remain cool, smoothing a comb through the dark mane.

“Since this is my last birthday in high school. We thought it was actually special.”

Cas’ mother made a sour face and pulled away. She said nothing more and he tried not to let it bother him. Instead, he finished fixing himself up and ran downstairs to grab his keys and get his shoes on. Gabriel was sitting on the sofa by the door, arms folded and frowning.

“Happy birthday,” he said snootily.

“Thank you,” Cas replied with a weak smile. “That’s nice of you.”

“Mleh.”

“What’s wrong?”

Gabe didn’t answer. He tossed a little box onto the coffee table. It was sloppily wrapped up with colored paper.

“What’s that?”

“For you,” Gabe grunted. Cas stared in disbelief as he went to take it.

“For me?” he asked just to make sure. Gabe nodded. Cas picked it up and carefully unwrapped it. Within the paper was a beat up cardboard box. It looked like it had been used for something else before. Cas tilted his head and shook it just a little.

“Open it!” Gabe yelled.

“Yes…” Cas took the top off of it and revealed a little smooth rock that had been painted like a bee. Googly eyes were glued on it. Cas smiled. “Did you paint this yourself?”

“Yeah,” Gabe said, using a tone that made it sound like he was being forced. Cas took the bee from the box and turned it over. He had painted **2 CAS** in bright red. “I know you like bees.”

“I do.” He put it into his pocket then leaned down to give Gabe a hug, which his younger brother reciprocated nicely. “Thank you.”

“Ya, ya, okay,” Gabe groaned. After a brief squeeze, he let off his brother and crossed his arms again. “Have fun with your _friends_.”

“I will,” Cas nodded. “And look how lucky I am to get a present this year!”

“Mleh.”

Cas chuckled slightly at his brother’s sour face, then took his keys from the table and stepped into his nice shoes. The plan was to meet Dean at the Shell around 7, that way he could leave his car there without his parents knowing who he was with. Cas said good bye to his little brother then went on his way.

* * *

“Glad you made it,” Dean said as Cas got inside the Chevy. The younger of them clicked his seatbelt and nodded silently. “Happy birthday again, by the way.”

“Thank you.”

“So I thought we can try that drive in place. You been there?”

“No.”

“They have this huge screen they set up outside, and the lot is real big so there’s plenty of room to find a nice space.”

“That sounds nice. I’d like that.”

“Yeah, thought so.”

Dean winked at Cas then drove out of the station’s parking lot. It wasn’t a terribly far drive, but it went in a direction he wasn’t familiar with. They drove for about twenty minutes, radio blasting old music Cas didn’t know but liked to hear Dean attempt to sing. The windows were all down and cool evening wind blew through.

“Wanna get some ice cream on our way?” Dean suggested.

“Alright,” said Cas. He bit his lower lip and looked out of the window. Already, Dean was spoiling him.

They just went to a drive-thru and picked up two little sundaes. It certainly wasn’t Haagen-Dazs but still cold, sweet and yummy. Cas held onto both of them as Dean kept driving.

“Gimme a spoonful,” Dean said.

“What?” Cas asked astonishedly.

“Yeah just gimme a spoonful,” he repeated, opening his mouth.

“Um!” Cas inhaled sharply as he took a spoon and lifted a little ice cream into it. He leaned over and put it into Dean’s mouth. His lips closed around it and Cas looked away.

“Yeah, thanks,” Dean said with a grin. “Not bad.”

“I-I suppose.”

“So how’s it feel to be eighteen?” Dean asked, completely diverting from any ice cream business. The drive in theatre was approaching now.

“Honestly, I don’t feel any different.”

“Yeah, I get how that is. Everyone makes a big deal but it doesn’t seem that way.”

Cas smiled bashfully. They pulled up into the big lot and Dean circled a few parked cars, looking for a good spot. Surrounding the giant projector screen was mostly gravel for the cars, but if you went back further it turned into grass and then it was all trees. Even if you stood at the edge of the trees you would get a nice view. Dean pointed that out as he drove back that way. He took a space off to the side but still a great angle of the movie screen, and shut off the engine. There weren’t any cars back there, and since it was a weeknight it wasn’t that crowded anyway.

“How’s this?” Dean asked. He put his arm on the back of the bench seat.

“It’s nice. Thank you.”

“You don’t have to thank me. I’ll take that sundae now.”

Cas looked at Dean very shyly and handed him his ice cream. He really wanted to lean in and kiss him, but he was far too nervous for that. At any rate, the screen turned on and the previews began to play anyway.

“Ahh, that looks awesome!” Dean hooted as a fast-paced action thriller preview zoomed by. “Fuck.”

“I suppose,” Cas said softly. He was just being polite; it looked cheesy and overdone.

“Oh man, gotta see that!” Dean cheered. “Shit! Sweet! We should see that when it comes out!” He basically had something energetic to say about every preview that played. The movie they came to watch was rather loud, aggressive and “manly” itself, so it was no wonder they got previews of that sort. Cas really didn’t care what was playing, that’s why he let Dean decide. He just wanted to be out and be with him.

The movie finally started and they kept their eyes glued to the screen, eating their ice cream in silence as a pretty lame plot unfolded. Dean was captivated by the gunfire and car chases, but Cas just went along with the ride to steal a couple looks at Dean every now and then. It was nice to be in that car with him. It smelled good.

When he was done with the sundae, he leaned over to Dean nervously and asked, “where do I put it?”

“In here, just in here,” said Dean. He took a plastic bag out of the glove compartment, flapped it open and held it to Cas. “Make sure you don’t drip anything.”

“Alright.”

Cas nodded happily and put his trash in it, then Dean dumped his in as well. The bag went carefully on the floor and Dean’s free hand sat on the seat in the middle. Cas stared at it in the darkness, lit only by the projector screen when the movie got bright. Those big, strong fingers looked like they needed to be touched. Cas knew how Dean felt about him, but even so, he was too nervous to make a move. So Dean did it for him; he lifted his palm off the seat and it went right onto Cas’ leg. The touch alone was pleasure inducing. Cas gasped very softly and tensed up.

“You okay?” Dean hummed, not taking his eyes off of the movie screen.

“Yes,” Cas said very quickly.

“Does this feel good?” His thumb rubbed over Cas’ leg.

“Yes…”

“Do you want me to touch you more?”

“Y-yes…”

Now Dean’s hand pressed harder and smoothed around to the inside of Cas’ leg. He rubbed in circles, moving closer and closer towards his crotch. Cas blushed heavily and tensed his muscles.

“Sure it’s okay?” Dean asked. He looked away from the movie now and leaned in closer to Cas.

“Yes. It’s very good.”

Dean’s fingers approached Cas’ fly and he held his breath. The touch was so tantalizingly sweet, so silky smooth and slow yet moved quickly. He watched the hand as it gently palmed his crotch. Beneath his pants, Cas was sporting a semi that immediately flickered into a raging boner.

“Oh gosh,” Cas gasped. “Oh, oh my.”

“It’s okay, baby,” Dean cooed. He rubbed the hardon through his pants gently as Cas whimpered, clutching the seat. “Come here.”

Then Dean let off of Cas’ crotch and instead took his right side. He pulled his hip towards him. Cas stared at Dean, biting his lower lip and watching with wide eyes. Dean leaned in to Cas’ ear and whispered, “Sit in my lap.”

“Are you sure?” Cas responded in a tiny voice.

“If you want to.”

Cas took a deep breath and nodded, then Dean sat back and motioned for him to come. Smiling timidly, Cas got up from his side and crawled to Dean, then straddled him. Dean’s hands went immediately onto Cas’ waist.

“How’s this?” Dean asked.

“I like it,” Cas said. He gently put his hands onto Dean’s firm shoulders and held on. He could feel a great big boner sitting at the center of Dean’s pants. In fact, it was so big that he got nervous.

“Anything wrong?”

“N-no,” Cas mumbled. Dean smiled real big then leaned in and gave him a kiss. It was so satisfying. Their lips met and popped softly, Dean taking the lead and really tasting Cas good. He prodded his tongue to separate both of Cas’ lips, which he allowed him to do with ease, then felt around as he went inside. Cas gasped around the feeling. It was good. It was so good. His dick was getting sticky and his breath hitched.

“You taste great,” Dean whispered between kisses, growing increasingly sloppier. Cas didn’t reply. He was too caught up in the moment. His hips rocked instinctively to press their cocks together between layers of clothing. “Cas?”

“Huh?” Cas moved back from Dean’s lips and stared at him. His eyes were wide with wonder.

“I really want to fuck you,” Dean whispered.

“Oh…”

“How do you feel about that?”

“I…I want you to fuck me…” Cas felt embarrassed to say that words.

“Yeah? Right now or?”

“Right now.”

“Mmm. Okay. Then let’s do it.”

Dean went back to kissing him. With the relief of his answered question now settling, his kissed him much stronger. His lips opened and sucked, pulling Cas’ this way and that, turning his head more and more to really dig in there. Cas wrapped his arms around Dean’s shoulders and held on, blushing so hard and feeling self-conscious about his own hardon. Clearly, Dean was bigger.

“Can I take your pants off?” Dean groaned.

“Y-yes.”

“Sit up a little.”

Cas propped himself up on his knees and Dean undid his fly. He tugged the pants down just a little and suddenly widened his eyes at what he saw.

“What is this!” he exclaimed. Cas blushed heavier and Dean ran his index finger along the rim of black lace trim that he found there. “Where’d you get these?”

“A friend,” Cas whispered so softly now. “I was, um, I was at her house working on a project, and well, she went to use the bathroom and I _may_ have taken them.”

“Oh, Cas,” Dean said, teasingly. “You? Steal? You stole panties?” His hand rubbed over the silky pink satin that covered his sticky hardon.

“I’m sorry,” Cas said ashamedly. “I’m not sure what was thinking, but, but I really fancy them.”

“Yeah, I fancy them, too,” Dean agreed. He appeared to be somewhat hypnotized by the feeling of Cas’ dick beneath the panties. “We should go shopping.”

“Where?”

“Doesn’t matter. We’ll figure it out.”

“Okay…”

Dean put his fingers into the panties and yanked them down. Cas yelped out loudly as his cock was exposed, dripping precum and already just a few strokes away from cumming. All of these sensations were so new and overwhelming for him!

“Can you reach back into the glove box and get that little metal box in there?” Dean asked. Cas nodded and did so, leaning over enough so that Dean could pull his panties and jeans all the way off of him. Dean clacked open the box and took out a little pillow-looking dosage of lubricant and a condom. “Safety first.”

“Right…”

Dean twisted the end off of the lube packet and spread it over his fingers. Then he reached back to Cas’ bare ass and spread his cheeks.

“Ahh,” Cas whined.

“What’s wrong?” Dean asked. He hadn’t even touched his hole yet.

“I’m shy about this.”

“What’s making you shy?”

“Nobody’s touched me here before.”

“I know. It’s fine. Don’t worry, okay? I’ll be very gentle and I’m not judging you at all.” Dean leaned forward and put a kiss onto Cas’ neck. “You’re very beautiful.”

Cas lit up like a Christmas tree. “B-beautiful?” He asked, nearly choking on his short breaths.

“Yeah.”

Dean kept his face in the crook of Cas’ tender neck as he spread his cheeks more and dipped his index finger to touch his asshole. Cas tried to ignore his embarrassment and focus on how amazing it felt. Dean’s finger. Dean’s big, wonderful finger was smearing cold lube on his hole. It was _incredible_. Then he slipped inside and Cas buckled.

“Aah!” he shouted.

“Shh, shh, it’s okay, it’s okay. I’m right here.”

Cas held onto Dean better. He slowed his breathing and worked hard to steady himself, relax his hole. Dean’s finger tenderly prodded around inside. Cas’ dick throbbed up against him, dribbling more precum.

“Oohh, God,” Dean groaned. He rubbed right up against Cas’ prostate, and the young man whinnied.

“Yaaa!! Aahhh!!”

“Gooood,” Dean growled in the back of his throat. His finger teased at the tender spot more.

“Ohh!! Deaan!”

“Ssshhh…” Dean’s lips laid hot kiss after hot kiss on Cas’ flesh. He slowly brought a second finger within and Cas gnashed his teeth together.

“Nnnggh…hnnngg…Dean…Dean…”

“Relax, baby.”

The big fingers scissored inside, stretching and preparing his tight, virgin hole as best as they could. Cas resisted the urge to let him orgasm go right then. It took great diligence but he was pulling it off all right. His fingers dug into Dean’s back as he focused.

“Think you’re ready?” Dean asked in a husky whisper. Cas said nothing, he just nodded. That was perfect for Dean. He slipped his fingers out of the hole then came around to his own crotch. He unzipped his fly and brought out his cock. Cas looked down and he almost screamed.

“I-it’s huge!”

“Haha, thanks.”

“Oh my God. Will it…will it fit?”

“Sure.”

“Ohh…now I’m scared,” Cas locked eyes with Dean and scrunched up his forehead. Dean kissed his lips.

“You’ll be fine. I’ll just put a little in at first, and if that hurts too much, we’ll stop. I promise.”

“O-okay…”

He ripped open the condom and slid it over the monster cock, jerked it a little then reached back to spread Cas’ cheeks. Cas closed his eyes and tried not to think about the girth of the thing.

“Here we go, sweetheart. Hang on tight and tell me if it’s bad.”

“Y-yes…”

Dean helped Cas lower onto the cock. He rubbed circles on the cheeks and lightly thrust his hips up at him. Cas pushed his face into the crook of Dean’s neck and gasped sharply against his skin. “Haa…haaa…aaah…”

The hole touched down onto Dean’s dick head and was stretch open. Though tight, it welcomed the cock and swallowed it up with only minor resistance.

“Ohh…ohh God…ohh God…” Cas moaned over and over. It was hard to believe that this was really happening. His innocence was gone. Dean was going inside. His virginity was being taken right then and there. He was an adult now.

“Gooood,” Dean’s low murmurs resounded as Cas’ hole swallowed a little more. Dean was able to grind somewhat and push with a slow, careful easing. “Baaaby…”

“Ahhhh…AAAH!!”

He couldn’t resist it any longer. Cas bucked and convulsed up against Dean and came. Without even using his hands, his cock throbbed hard and shot a heavy load right onto Dean’s shirt. He gasped and screamed, squeezed his arms around Dean’s shoulders and twitched over and over. Dean just smoothed his hands over his cheeks.

“Mmmm…what a sweet little boy…”

“Haaaaaa…aaaah…”

Cas’ head was spinning. The dick was huge. It was good. It was Dean and it was good. He couldn’t slow his thoughts down, now. They would just come and come, the same as his cock. Small pearls kept running from the head of his dick and his felt chills down his back.

“Ohh…okay…it’s…ah…it hurts a little.”

“Sorry, sorry,” Dean said quickly. The sensuality of it all suddenly died and he slipped his giant cock out of Cas’ ass.

“Hnngg…”

He pulsated a few times. No, no; his entire body pulsated. He collapsed into Dean’s arms and lay like that as he attempted to catch his thoughts and breath.

“I wanted you to get off,” Cas muttered.

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yeah it’s fine. What’s important is that you feel good.”

“I do…”

“Mmm…”

The movie played on and Dean just held Cas against his chest. He rubbed his back. He stroked his cheeks. He ran trails up and down his spine and occasionally kissed him. It was beautiful and amazing and everything Cas could have possibly dreamed. In fact, a dream couldn’t even come up with a better way to lose his virginity. So he drank in that scene for a while until the movie ended. Then they had to get dressed and go home, but it was worth it. So worth it.


	8. The Exploration Begins

“Everthing ok?”

“U feel alright?”

“Need anything?”

“Glad we went?”

Dean arguably overdid it with the texts messages over the next couple days. Cas didn’t mind, though, in fact he thought it was very sweet. Nobody had ever cared so much about him and if it was a little too much, well, that was just alright.

“Yes, I’m fine, thank you.”

“I wanna see u again.”

“Me, too.”

“When can we?”

“Anytime, I guess.”

So it was after Cas’ shift on Saturday that he made plans to see Dean again. But this time, it was different. Cas didn’t need to leave his car anywhere and get picked up because he was going straight to Dean’s place. He lived about fifteen minutes from the Shell station in a townhouse. Interesting enough, it was Cas’ idea that he come over. “I don’t want to be hiding,” he had said. “I want to be free to express myself.” And that’s how he ended up parking in front of the townhouse, then nervously taking steps up to the door, ringing the bell and waiting patiently with the best “I’m _not_ afraid” smile he could put on.

“Hey,” Dean said when the door opened up. He looked him over from top to bottom and smirked. “You look cute. Come on in.”

Cas didn’t say anything, though he silently agreed that the same comment applied to Dean, but gave a slight nod as he stepped within. Dean’s place was nice. It was modestly furnished with things that didn’t really match but weren’t particular enough to clash terribly. He left his shoes at the door and began to walk around the living room. There were pictures on the walls that caught his attention.

“Three tours,” Dean said. “Can I get you anything?”

“I’m fine,” Cas peeped. The photos were of him and a bunch of other people in the Middle East, clearly military related. “I didn’t know you…”

“I’m in the reserves.”

“Oh.”

Dean chuckled from the kitchen, getting a beer for himself and cracking it open. “That alright?”

“Yes, of course. It just surprised me. I assumed you were a mechanic and that’s all.”

“Nope.”

The man came around and walked up behind Cas, who was distracted by the pictures, then slipped his arms around his waist and pulled him back.

“Oh!” Cas gasped. “Oh my!”

Dean’s lips pressed to Cas’ neck, then he propped his chin there and kept sipping his beer. Cas wasn’t sure what to do.

“This alright?” Dean asked.

“Mm. Yes. It’s good.”

“Cool.” More kisses on his neck and Cas moaned loudly. What a feeling! “You should spent the night.”

“What?”

“You should spend the night with me.”

“But I’ve never spent the night away from home.”

“Yeah and you’ve never been eighteen before.” Another kiss. “No pressure, it’s up to you. But if you want my opinion, I’d really like it.” Yet another kiss.

“Ah…I’ll think about it.”

Dean smiled against Cas’ neck and let his tongue slip out to lick him. Cas instantly closed his eyes and moaned more.

“Damn, you react to everything.”

“It all feels so good!” Cas squealed.

“Come to my bedroom.”

“Now?”

“Yeah.”

Dean took his arms off of Cas and walked up the stairs. Blushing so much that he was getting dizzy, Cas held his hands to his chest and followed Dean up there. A couple doors were in the skinny hall but only one was open, and that’s the one they took. Inside he had a great big king sized bed, a shoddy dresser in the corner and a little nightstand with an old, crappy alarm clock on top. He walked over to it and set his beer on the narrow surface.

“Make yourself at home, Cas.”

“Thank you.”

Well it certainly wasn’t what he would do at home, but Cas thought it might be nice to lose some layers, so he pulled off his shirt and took down his pants. Dean stared wide-eyed. “Oh, wow,” he gasped.

“Is this alright?” Cas asked.

“Y-yeah, it’s more than alright.” Dean continued to stare, hypnotized almost. He slowly sat down onto the bed, pulled his legs up on it as well and patted the covers. “Why don’t you sit here with me?”

“Alright,” said Cas. He stepped out of his pants and crawled on top of the bed, right up to Dean then sat on his knees. “Are you alright?”

“I haven’t really had the chance to see your body this well,” Dean said, slowly extending one arm and touching Cas’ bare shoulder. He smoothed his palm down it and watched himself with great curiosity. “You have the most beautiful figure.”

“Um, I guess,” Cas giggled.

“No, seriously,” Dean insisted. His other hand went onto the opposing shoulder and rubbed them both. Cas blinked very slowly and sighed. Dean’s touch was wonderful. “Your skin is so smooth, and…” Dean had to lean in and kiss the young man’s neck. Cas shivered. “Young, tender, strong, lean…”

“Y-you flatter me too much,” Cas hummed.

“Nope.”

“But I—“

“You are.”

Dean sat up and pulled Cas in for a kiss now. He hugged him tight and sucked on his lower lip, breathing heavily and palming his hands down his sides now. Cas squealed and wriggled against him. When the kiss broke, both of them panting lightly, Cas stared back at Dean and whispered, “May I see more of you?”

“Yeah, what do you wanna see?”

Cas swallowed and clenched his jaw. “All of you?”

“Haha, is that an answer or another question?”

“An answer, I suppose.”

“Okay, sit back for a second.”

Cas retreated to his upright position, then Dean leaned back a little, spreading his legs around Cas and pulled off his shirt. Cas stared in surprise as he saw that Dean had a decent amount of ink on him. Celtic knot-work on his left breast, sleeves on both arms that stop just barely at t-shirt length, and something very detailed and large on his right ribcage.

“Oh…”

“Huh?” Dean asked grinning. He lay on his back and began to unzip his pants. Cas’ heart raced. So he had already been fucked by that cock, but getting a better chance to see it was exciting. Dean tugged his pants and underwear down, displaying a fair amount of lightly trimmed body hair, more tattoos on his thighs and of course the massive dong. It was only semi-erect but that was big enough. “Look alright?”

“Yes,” Cas answered quickly. He cupped both of his hands over his face and looked Dean over, blushing and giggling with high strung nerves. Freckles. The freckles were everywhere. They peppered each inch of flesh.

“Something wrong?” Dean asked and Cas just shook his head. “You can touch me any way, if that helps.”

“V-very well.”

A slim, shaking hand reached out and gently touched Dean’s inner thigh. The older man rolled his head back and groaned, closing his eyes slightly as he drank in the wonderful sensation of Cas’ touch. His dick throbbing and began to grow. Cas brought his other hand along, too, and touched the opposite thigh. His fingers ran lines up and down, just watching his Dean reacted and enjoying the ability to touch him.

“Can I touch your genitals?” Cas asked softly. Dean chuckled.

“Yeah, ‘course. Touch anything you want. Take your time and get to know me. All of me. I’ll just lay here until you want me to do something. How’s that sound?”

Cas smiled very shyly. “That’s good,” he said with a tiny nod. Then he slowly, slowly leaned his face down to Dean’s crotch and touched his nose against the base of his shaft. Dean let a low, throaty moan ease from his lips, wetting them with his tongue several times. Cas rubbed his nose across the taught skin, feeling it expand and contract with his touch. His pubic hair was soft and inviting, smelled of heavy musk with a slight tinge of clean soap, and Cas wanted to spend the rest of his life like that. He pursed his lips and kissed the neatly shaven ball sack several times.

“Damn,” Dean grunted. “Fuck.”

“Is something wrong?” asked Cas, peering up at him.

“No, no, not at all. It’s fuckin’ wonderful. These kissing you’re giving me…” Dean reached down at ran his fingers through Cas’ hair. The younger man gazed at him, lips about half an inch away from his testicles, eyes full of wonder and cheeks a light rosy hue. “Angel kisses,” Dean said. “Little angel kisses from a sweet little angel.”

Cas blushed and narrowed his eyes. His hold on Dean’s thighs tightened slightly and he kissed the sack once more.

“Cas?”

“Mm?”

“Could I fuck you again?”

Cas frowned. “Um, now?”

“Whenever you’re comfortable.”

“O-okay. Um, maybe not right now.”

He moved away from his crotch and sat up again, fingers still rubbing the strong thighs. Dean looked concerned. “Is something wrong?” he asked.

“No,” Cas hummed. “I just, oh, is this silly? I know we’ve had sex already, but I want to slow down a little bit.”

“It’s not silly at all. Come up here.” Dean motioned to one side of him. Cas nodded and crawled up there, then lay on his side and stretched one skinny arm across Dean’s chest. “The last thing I want to do is pressure you.”

“I know. Thank you.”

Dean cupped Cas’ face in his cheek. “You’re a beautiful, precious boy. Life’s been rough for you and I don’t want to do _anything_ to make that worse. But I do really care about you, Cas.”

Cas hid his face behind Dean’s shoulder and the man laughed. “Don’t do that, look at me,” he said sweetly. Cas poked his eyes up and darted them around.

“Why,” Cas said in a tiny voice.

“Cas, look at me.”

“O-okay…”

“Your comfort is my number one priority, okay?”

“Okay.”

“If you just wanna lay in bed for a couple hours and slowly get to know each other’s bodies, I’m totally cool with that.”

Cas giggled. “O-okay,” he said, looking happier. “I like that.”

“But,” Dean added, raising his eyebrows and smiling like an idiot. “I feel like there’s a part of you that wants to get really naughty.”

“Well, maybe,” Cas sighed. “That’s possible.”

“I think we can find out in time.”

“Mmm.”


	9. Revealing More

Dean let Cas relax there for a while. He toyed with the dark tufts of soft hair, running them between his fingers and feeling how nice and smooth they were. Cas closed his eyes and smiled happily, nuzzling into Dean’s strong chest. He was very content. Dean treated him with special tenderness that he truly appreciated.

“Dean…”

“Yeah?”

They hadn’t said anything for a few minutes.

“I think maybe I’m ready to play around some more.”

“Heheh, alright. What do you wanna do?”

Cas shrugged. “Something…”

Dean carefully moved Cas off of his chest and sat up. “How about you take your briefs off?” he suggested. “Then, if you’d like, I can touch you better.”

“Alright,” Cas agreed. He rolled onto his back and, watching Dean with nervous eyes, brought his knees up to his chest and tugged his little briefs down. Dean immediately went between his legs, set his hands on top of Cas’ knees and asked, “can I spread them?”

“Yes.”

“Awesome.”

So Dean, biting his tongue gently, pulled Cas’ legs apart and spread them so he could see everything. The young man was flaccid and his cock just sat on his balls, surrounded by hair that had been casually trimmed down somewhat. Cas blushed and looked away as Dean brought a hand to his package and rubbed him.

“You’re beautiful,” Dean whispered. Cas didn’t say anything. “You really are.”

“I-I don’t know.”

“Yeah well I do,” said Dean. He palmed Cas’ balls and lightly ran his fingertips around the shaft as it flicked and throbbed, pulsating quickly with blood. Cas whimpered. “And I think this is the most beautiful cock I’ve ever seen.”

“How many have you seen?” Cas asked. As soon as the question slipped out, he thought it sounded dumb. Dean shrugged.

“A good amount.”

“Um…have you had a lot of partners?”

“A good amount,” Dean repeated. He looped his index finger and thumb around the base of Cas’ cock and began to very lightly jerk him. Cas curled his toes and grabbed at the covers.

“D-did they come by the shop a lot?”

“Why are you asking?”

“Um…haaah…Bobby?”

“What about him?” Dean jerked faster. Precum ran down the shaft.

“Bobby said s-something about you have ‘little guys’ bring you pie.”

“Oh,” the older man said, clearing his throat. “That was a while ago, Cas. Don’t worry about it.”

Cas frowned. “I don’t understand.” Dean let out a long sigh and he released the dick, throbbing and needy, from his grip. Cas whimpered.

“I used to know a lot of guys back in the day.”

“Lovers?”

“Sorta.”

“What do you mean?”

“I made some bad decisions. We used to have orgies and I met a lot of guys who would really dig me.”

Cas blinked. “…orgies?”

“I don’t do it anymore. It was a passing thing, when I was active duty. Just seemed nice to blow off some steam, no pun intended, by getting completely shit faced and having a bunch of guys lick me all over.”

“Oh,” Cas said, blushing more. “Um. Okay. But…not anymore?”

“No, it’s totally uninteresting nowadays. I just want a partner now. Someone faithful and monogamous.”

“I see…”

Dean looked at Cas and frowned. “I’m sorry, Cas. I didn’t want to upset you.”

“I’m not upset,” Cas said. “It comes as a surprise, that’s all.”

“Sure?”

“I’m sure.”

“Good. So, is there anything you want me to do to you?”

“I don’t know,” said Cas, shaking his head. “What would you like to do?”

“Oh man, _everything_!” Dean grinned. “I want to touch you everywhere. Do everything and anything. I…ah…I just…ah…”

Looking slightly overwhelmed, Dean suddenly lurched forward and put his face against Cas’ chest. He pursed his lips and kissed him over and over, towering over his thin body and grabbing his waist. Cas closed his eyes and yelped to himself from the sensations as Dean ran his tongue across the flesh and to a nipple.

“Oh, oh gosh!” Cas squealed. Dean took the tiny bud between his teeth and very delicately licked over it. “Aahh! Dean!”

The man’s green eyes flashed up at him and smiled with nipple in his mouth. “Like that?” he whispered.

“Y-yes…goodness…ahh…”

Blinking slowly, Dean sucked on it briefly then let it go. “Are you gonna spend the night with me?”

“I would like to, yes.”

“Mmm I want you to, too.” He moved over to the other nipple and gave it the same attention, sending more electrical charges down Cas’ spine and causing him to twist and convulse in ways he never had before. Their bare bodies rubbed together when Dean began kissing up to Cas’ neck, tasting the young skin and pulling him close. Without even thinking it through, Cas brought up his skinny legs around Dean’s waist and squeezed.

“Deaaaan!” gasped a tiny, desperate voice.

“You like this?” Dean growled, nipping and sucking at the neck flesh now. Cas quickly grew overwhelmed and quite flushed by the feelings, grinding his teeth as tiny squeals slipped out between them.

“Y-yes,” he groaned.

“You want more?”

“Yes…”

“What do you want?”

“I-I don’t know!”

“Hm…how about this?”

Suddenly, Dean backed down between Cas’ legs, putting his knees upon his shoulders and shoved his face beneath Cas’ package. The young man yelled out in surprise the moment Dean went there. His legs twitched and wiggled.

“Shh, shh, relax, baby,” Dean cooed. He opened his mouth and brought Cas’ tender sack inside. Eyes stuck open and staring at the ceiling, Cas gasped and whimpered from the new feelings, meanwhile Dean very delicately worked his tongue over the scrotum. “Goood…” his throaty voice cooed in small whispers from time to time.

“Ohh! God! Aahh!” Cas yelped as his head shook from side to side. It was becoming unbearable. His legs wiggled and fidgeted, toes touching each other across Dean’s big back, all working in a manner that seemed torn between incredibly pleasure and extreme discomfort.

“Want more?” Dean asked, letting that swollen balls leave his hold. Cas glanced down at him, eyes wiggling and tongue hanging out between heavy sighs and nodded. With a quick grin, Dean kept his sight fixed on Cas but slowly went lower and lower, dotting kisses across his taint until he reached the hole. Cas then closed his eyes and made a sound of disapproval. “What’s wrong?” Dean hummed, lighting touching the tip of his tongue to the tender flesh around the asshole.

“T-that’s my butthole,” Cas whimpered and Dean chuckled.

“Yeah, I know,” the older man said. He pressed a kiss to the hole and Cas moaned inside a breathy gasp. “It’s awesome.”

“Y-you’re putting your mouth on my butthole,” Cas squealed.

“Ever heard of a rimjob?”

“Yes, but…but isn’t that gross?”

Dean shook his head. He rubbed his palms across Cas’ cheeks and spread them a bit more. “It’s beautiful. Are you embarrassed about something down here?”

“It’s…” Cas frowned and looked down at Dean with sad eyes. “It’s just that you shouldn’t look at my butthole.”

“Why?”’

“It’s my butthole, it’s dirty.”

“Cas, I _fucked_ your ‘butthole’ already. If it was dirty I wouldn’t do that.”

“I guess…”

Dean put another kiss on the hole and Cas moaned. “It feels good, doesn’t it?”

“Y-yes…”

More kisses. Slow, warm, melting kisses. He used his tongue gently and it smacked wet noises around. Cas closed his eyes real tight and clenched his jaw.

“Want me to stop?” Dean asked.

“N-no,” Cas cooed in a tiny voice. Dean grinned.

“Feels too good?”

“…yeah.”

“See? It’s not dirty or embarrassing. Just relax.”

Cas nodded slowly in agreement, trying to regulate his breathing a little more as Dean began to lick him better. He kept his tongue wet as small, quick laps brushed over the pulsating hole.

“Ohh gosh,” Cas whimpered. “Oooooh gosh!”

Dean just growled in the depth of his throat, staring at Cas’ wiggling body, licking and licking his tight boy pussy with increasing fervor. Cas’ cock throbbed red hot, swelling all over and convulsing over and over. Shaky hands from the young man slowly moved down towards his crotch, apprehensive to grab but so overwhelmed by the carnal need that he grabbed Dean’s head and pushed it against himself harder. Dean happily shoved in there with a small smirk and licked more, prodding his warm, wet tongue into the hole and teasing.

“Gaaaah! Aaaah!!” Cas screamed. His fingers tried to grab Dean’s short hair but couldn’t get enough. He bucked his hips into his face and writhed back into the mattress. “Sh-shit!!”

Dean closed his eyes as he kept working. His licks grew intense, tongue-fucking Cas so passionately with all sorts of noises. He grunted softly and sucked the rim a little, then one hand slowly slid up from Cas’ ass and to his crotch, where he grabbed his throbbing cock and squeezed lightly.

“AAAAH!!” Cas yelled, his voice cracked. The moment that Dean touched his dick, he thrust into the fist and came. Small, violent bursts of cum sprayed onto his own chest and he cried louder and louder, grinding those thin hips against Dean’s face with gasping, desperate pleads of nothingness. His fingers relaxed and he whimpered, falling into the mattress with his muscles turning to jelly. Dean smirked and give a few light kisses to his hole before taking the knees off of his shoulders and sitting up.

“See? Not embarrassing.”

“Ummh…o…okay…”

Dean stroked Cas’ thigh a little. The young man flinched under the touch. “You okay?”

“Y-yes…”

“Hungry?”

“Yes.”

“Want me to make you something?”

“Um,” Cas opened his eyes and looked at Dean as he sat up on his elbows. His breathing was still heavy and he had trouble focusing completely. “I don’t want to bother you like that.”

“Not a bother at all. Wanna come down with me or wait here?”

“Oh, I’ll come with you.”

“Up for it?”

Cas nodded. “Sure,” he said, then somehow managed to roll of the bed and stand on his feet. Dean got up as well, went to his closet and tossed a large piece of clothing at Cas, who caught it but looked it over oddly. “What is this?”

“A robe, if you want. Might be cold downstairs.”

“Oh, thank you.” Cas blushed as he put the big sleeves over his arms. It didn’t quite fit him, but enough that it would stay on. Dean pulled up a pair of boxer briefs and a tank top then went downstairs, of course not before looking at Cas and telling him he looked cute.

“What do you feel like eating?”

“I really don’t want to bother you with much. I suppose, anything that you feel like.”

Cas followed Dean back down into the kitchen and leaned against the threshold shyly. The big sleeves of his robe covered both his hands as they fidgeted with each other. Dean opened up the fridge and looked around.

“I’m not a super amazing cook but I don’t think I’m bad. You live on your own long enough to pick up a few things. I can throw us together some decent dinner.”

Cas looked down at his feet and pressed his lips together. He was feeling out of his element. Dean was such a great guy and so caring, so intimate and wonderful to him, but he couldn’t help but think he was out of place to be with him.

Dean filled a pot with water and turned the stove on underneath it. He looked over and saw Cas being shy then stepped up to him and lightly touched his face, turning him to have their eyes meet. “Cas…what’s wrong?”

“I feel strange.”

“Pain? Sick?”

“No…”

“What is it?”

“I, well,” Cas hesitated. His wobbly blue eyes darted from Dean’s caring gaze and scanned the kitchen.

“What?”

“I feel like I’m too young for this sort of relationship.”

“But you’re an adult now. It’s totally fine.”

“I know, but legalities aside; someone as wonderful as you should put their compassion into a person that can give the same thing back.”

“What are you talking about?” Dean asked, furrowing his brow. “I’m not that wonderful, and you’re _totally_ able to make this meaningful. Why’d you think you aren’t?”

“Because I’m so young.”

“Baby, that means nothing. Some people start _families_ before their 18. Now if that’s not meaningful and adult, I don’t know what is.”

Cas hummed sadly and frowned, but Dean wasn’t going to have any of that. He removed his hand from the soft cheek and instead hugged him. His strong arms wrapped around Cas’ shoulders and pulled him close, so secure and comfortable, that Cas closed his eyes and leaned into the crook of his neck. Dean smelled good. So good.

“You over think stuff too much,” Dean whispered.

“I know,” said Cas.

“It’s good ‘cause it means you’re smart, but you oughta tone it down just a pinch or you’re gonna sit in judgment of yourself too much.”

“I know.”

They hugged for a moment in silence, then Dean patted Cas on the back and said, “You like pasta?”


	10. Tenderness

“That’s fine. I’m not picky.”

“Yeah, I know,” Dean said with a grin. He took a saucepan out from a cabinet and set it on the stove, then he reached up into a high cupboard and took out a few jars of spices, along with a garlic bulb. “You’re in for a treat.”

“Am I?” Cas asked, cocking his head. He stood against the countertop with the big robe sleeves hanging over his hands. Dean chuckled as he began cracking cloves of garlic beneath a big knife.

“Yup,” said Dean. “I don’t know how to cook much, but pasta is one thing I can do and I do _good_.”

“Okay,” Cas said with a nod. He watched Dean as he swooshed about the kitchen, taking this and that, then he turned the flame beneath the pot and poured some oil into it.

“It’s gonna take a little bit so why don’t you take a seat?”

“Right, alright,” Cas peeped, nodding again. He went to the small table that sat off to the side and plopped down. He closed his legs and smoothed the robe over them, feeling shy even though Dean had already seen everything.

“Doing okay, babe?” Dean asked after stealing a quick glance over his shoulder. He poured a box of pasta into the water and gave it a stir.

“I’m fine,” said Cas. He pursed his lips and glanced downwards. “Why did you learn how to make pasta?”

“Oh, oh,” Dean smirked. The garlic was tossed into the saucepan and sizzled loudly. A wonderful smell soon filled the entire kitchen. “It was something my mom came up with. She made it all the time.”

“That’s cool. My mother cooks often, too, but it’s not very good. What else does yours make?”

“Nothing anymore,” Dean said with a slight sigh. He used a spoon to turn the garlic over and over, occasionally sprinkling in some spices. Cas watched him curiously.

“Did something happen?”

“Yeah, um, she died when I was little.”

“Ohhhh,” Cas inhaled. “I’m sorry! I didn’t know!”

“Shh, shh; it’s fine. You _didn’t_ know. Don’t worry about it.”

Dean flashed a sad smile back at the young man for a moment before returning to his sauce making. He went to the fridge and pulled out a pack of ground beef. As he peeled off the plastic, his eyes stared at the meat with a strange sentimentality.

“Um…do you want to talk about it?” Cas asked awkwardly. Dean laughed.

“Heheh, it’s been a long time since I told anybody.”

Clumps of beef went into the pan slowly and Cas smiled. “How well did you know her?”

“I remember her,” said Dean. He had a dreamy, faraway look in his eyes as he spoke, stirring the meat and spices. “Just barely, though.”

“That’s nice.”

“Yeah, she was real special.” The older man took his hands away from the pan momentarily to open up a can of sauce. He poured it over the meat, turned the flame down and kept stirring. “She was smart and pretty, talented, kind. Dad said she was sorta shy but I don’t remember that. I know she was a great cook. I got a couple of her recipes but this was the only one that seemed easy enough for me to learn.”

Cas nodded. “I wish I had good memories of _my_ mother.”

“Don’t have any?”

“No. She has always been difficult. I guess I’ve been telling myself she cares, but as I reflect on the past I can see that she doesn’t.”

“Hey, now don’t say that,” Dean hummed. He lifted a single piece of pasta from the boiling water and stared at it. “I’m sure she cares about you, just not in a way that’s at all useful.”

“What do you mean?”

“I think everyone _tries_. Every parent is the best parent they can be. Just uh, sometimes the best they can be really fucking sucks.”

Cas nodded in a careful agreement. “That’s a very good point.”

“I know a little something about bad parents, too.”

“Your father?”

“Yeah,” Dean said, sucking his teeth. He took a colander from a drawer and set it into the sink, then lifted the pot of pasta and poured it all into it. A big rush of hot water and a cloud of steam rose up, hushing Dean for a moment, then it he dropped a dollop of butter into the pot and returned the pasta, giving it a stir back on the stove. “My dad’s an asshole.”

“I’m sorry to hear that.”

“Eh,” Dean shrugged. “I battled it for a while, but joining the military blew off a lot of that steam. I got away from him. We all did.”

“We?”

“My brothers. I think I mentioned them before. I got two, just like you.”

“Oh, that’s right,” Cas said, smirking. “Where do they live?”

Dean got two soup plates from a cabinet and began to load them up. “Middle guy is in Washington, youngest goes to school in Alabama. How much do you want?”

“Just _some_ ,” said Cas. He watched Dean pile pasta onto the plate and nodded when it was enough. Thick sauce was drizzled on top and he brought it to the table. “Thank you. Thank you very, very much.”

“Don’t mention it,” said Dean. He got a plate for himself and put it across from Cas, but before he sat he went out onto the little porch. “Just a second.” The young man sat in mystery as Dean grabbed something out there. His return was prompt and his fist was full of tender green leaves. “Gotta put this on top,” he said, rinsing then chopping them up real fine. He leaned over the table and crumbled a couple handfuls over each of their plates.

“What is that?”

“Basil,” said Dean.

“Are you growing herbs out there?”

Dean narrowed his eyes. “Yes,” he said slowly. “But it’s manly, okay?” He chuckled a little and went to the fridge. “You want anything to drink? I guess it’d be wrong for me to offer you a beer.”

“I’m fine, thank you. Um. Maybe water, actually.”

“Sure.”

He came back with a beer for himself and a glass of ice water for Cas. “Cheers!” he said, raising the bottle to Cas’ water.

“Cheers…”

They clinked them together and Dean took a big sip. “Go ahead. See how you like mom’s special recipe.”

“Of course,” said Cas. He smiled with his eyes closed momentarily, then lifted his fork and had a small bite of the pasta. He chewed it pensively, swallowed then announced, “It’s lovely!”

“Thanks. So are you.”

Cas’ eyes opened up real wide and he blushed. “Um, okay!”

Dean shook his head. “You gotta take compliments just a smidgen better,” he said, shoveling pasta into his mouth.

“I’m not sure how?”

“Don’t act so surprised,” Dean said with a mouthful. Cas poked the pasta with his fork and didn’t answer. “I mean hey, don’t get me wrong; you’re totally adorable when you’re embarrassed, but I feel bad, you know? Every time I tell you you’re beautiful you act like it’s not true.”

“ _It’s not_ ,” Cas muttered.

“No!” Dean yelled. He put his fork down and stared at Cas. The young man locked up and retracted into the chair. “It _is_ true!”

Cas suddenly looked horrified. Hearing Dean’s voice get so loud sent a horrific sensation down his spine and he curled up in his seat, eyes wobbling in fear. But Dean realized this right away and looked sad.

“Cas,” he said softly, leaning across the table and touching the floppy sleeve around his arm. “I’m sorry.”

“I-it’s okay,” Cas stuttered in a tiny voice.

“No, it’s not okay. I shouldn’t have yelled. It’s upsetting to see you hate yourself so much, that’s all. But I overreacted.”

Cas shook his head. “It’s okay.”

Dean’s big hand smoothed over the fabric. “Sure?”

“Yes. Really.” Cas tried to force a smile then he went back to eating. “Thank you again for making dinner.”

Dean sat back in his chair and sighed sadly. He picked up his fork and pressed his lips into a dissatisfied smile. “I didn’t wanna upset you.”

“Oh, Dean, I said it’s okay. Please don’t worry about it.”

“But you really freaked,” Dean said. “I don’t like to see you make that sort of face. It’s sad.”

“I, ah, to be honest it reminded me of my father, that’s all.”

Dean stared at Cas concernedly. “What d’you mean?”

“Those few times he’s hit me, he would—“

Dean interrupted. He interrupted with a serious, heated scowl. “He hit you?! I thought you said your parents never did?!”

Cas turned his head away from Dean, looking wounded and embarrassed. “I lied,” he whispered in the tiniest voice.

“Why did you lie about that?” Dean asked, trying to take the rage out of his voice. He get up from his seat and came around to Cas’ side, putting his arms around him. Cas fell into his embrace like a loneloy child.

“I was scared,” Cas said, starting to tear up. Dean pat the back of his head lovingly.

“Scared of what, baby?”

“Father said I couldn’t tell _anyone_.”

“Or?”

“Or I would go to Hell.”

“That’s dumb,” said Dean. “Sorry. It’s dumb.”

Cas sniffled and clung to Dean’s chest, eyes closed, body in a tight little ball.

“C’mon, Cas. I don’t think we’re gonna eat anymore tonight, huh?”

“N-no,” Cas cried.

“Shh, shh, it’s okay, babe. Give me a sec to clean up.”

Dean reluctantly let go of Cas then quickly wrapped their plates up plastic, stowed them in the fridge with the leftovers but everything else was still sitting out. He had to take care of Cas. Non-perishables could wait.

“I-I wanna stay here,” Cas sobbed.

“Yeah, yeah that’s fine. You can stay here.”

He helped Cas stand up and they returned upstairs. Dean took him into the bathroom and got him a brand new toothbrush. “How’s this?”

“Thank you,” Cas muttered. His soft face was blotchy from crying, but he was feeling much better now. They cleaned up quickly then went into the bedroom.

“Do you need anything else?” Dean asked. Cas took the robe off, put it on a hook over the closet door and shook his head. Of course, Dean’s eyes fell to Cas’ nude body, but he controlled himself and tried to focus rather on the emotional damage he wanted to repair. He got beneath the covers and called for Cas to join him, which he slowly, carefully did. “Nice and safe here. How’s this?”

“Good,” Cas hummed. Dean hugged the young man’s back to his chest so that they spooned, keeping him very close and of course quite warm. He pressed kisses on Cas’ neck.

“I’m real sorry about your folks,” Dean whispered.

“It’s okay,” said Cas.

“No, it’s not okay.” More kisses. Muah, muah, muah. His lips smacked continuously through his hushed words. “I’m gonna make it all better.”

Cas closed his eyes and let out a long, content breath of air. It was perhaps the first time in his life that he actually could say he felt completely safe. “Thank you.”


	11. On the Horizon

 

Cas was positively freezing when he woke up. Somehow he had managed to roll out of Dean’s embrace and onto his stomach, certainly still naked and certainly cold. This unfortunately made waking up a startling and unpleasant experience. “Cold…cold…” He murmured in a sleepy disillusion, groping around for the man next to him. Dean was on his back, arms bent up by his head and his mouth cocked open to let snores come out. When Cas’ hand fell on his chest, the younger of them pulled himself over and clung to his torso.

“Mmmh…come…come here…” Dean gurgled. He slipped his sleepy arms around Cas’ body and hoisted him up on his chest with a loud grunt. Cas cuddled up to his chest and rubbed their cheeks together. Dean did, however, have an incredible case of morning wood hiding beneath his underwear.

“I’m so cold,” Cas whispered.

“Stay here,” was Dean’s response. He rubbed his big hands up and down Cas’ back, pulling their chests together. “Get warm.”

As Dean’s rock hard boner ground against the growing semi Cas was sporting, he couldn’t help but blush hard and squirm a bit. Tired grunts came from Dean’s mouth as he thrust his hips upwards.

“Oh,” Cas inhaled. “Dean.”

“Feel good?” Dean hummed.

“Oh, oh, gosh. Yes.”

The older man smiled real big and pushed his palms down harder. A thin sliver of warm tongue slipped between his grinning lips then whispered, “grind our cocks together.”

“Just like this?” Cas asked shyly. He gripped onto Dean’s shoulders and began to hump his bare cock against the clothed one. It was good. It was so good. They moaned and grunted in unison, rubbing and thrusting together. “Ohhh…”

“Like that?” Dean asked.

“Ohh, ohh, goodness. It’s…it’s _so good_.”

Dean put his hands onto the slender hips and helped Cas grind against him. They worked their bodies like snakes, writhing and sliding against one another with an agonizingly slow and hot rhythm. Cas closed his eyes tightly and he moaned tiny, needy peeps as sticky precum dripped from the tip of his dick.

“Can you cum like this?” Dean asked, raising his eyebrows. But Cas shook his head. He stopped rocking hi ships. “Try, baby.”

“But I don’t think I can.”

The freckled man laughed. “What’s the worst that could happen?”

“Mmmh…oh, that’s true.”

“C’mon.”

Shyly, Cas giggled and nuzzled his nose against Deans. They locked eyes and kept grinding together again, harder this time. Dean’s face flushed red and he groaned. “Ohh, that feels good, huh?”

“Y-yes,” Cas hummed. He furrowed his brow and kept working his core. The head of his dick continuously rubbed and rubbed along the length of Dean’s shaft. Cas’ nails dug into the shoulders and he went even faster. Their breathing grew quicker. “Oh, oh God!”

“Fuck! Fuck, Cas! Aah fuck!”

“ **No**!”

Cas’ shout stopped Dean dead cold. He stared at him with great big concerned eyes and said, “Baby? What’s wrong??”

Cas shook his head furiously. “I don’t want to cum,” he insisted. Dean sighed and smoothed down the back of Cas’ bedhead. “Why?” he asked.

“Because I always cum but I haven’t been able to get you off.”

“Aww, hey, it’s fine.”

“No, no!” Cas whined. “It’s not. I don’t want to be selfish like that!”

“Cas, that’s not being selfish,” Dean said softly. He exhaled a little then kissed the young man on his lips with a tiny _pop_. “I’m taking care of you and making you comfortable. I don’t always need to get off.”

“But I haven’t been able to at all!”

“We haven’t really tried, though.”

Cas looked sad and turned his eyes to the side. Dean would have none of that. He took the dark haired boy’s face in his hand and made him face forward again. “Are you ready for me to fuck you again?” Cas shook his head.

“I’m sorry!” he cried.

“It’s okay, it’s okay. You _gotta_ stop feeling bad about everything. If you aren’t ready, you aren’t ready. But here’s the question; if you’re so concerned about getting me off, would you like to try sucking my dick?”

Cas winced. “Um, I’m not sure. I mean I _want_ to, but I’m not sure if I will be any good.”

“Give it a shot?

“Very well.”

“Alright,” Dean said, trying to suppress a very giddy grin. “Get down between my legs.”

“Alright.” Cas nodded happily and slowly disappeared beneath the covers. As he climbed down, Dean tugged his own boxer briefs off to expose his aching hard on. Cas put his hand on the base and squeezed lightly.

“Aahh, shit,” Dean groaned. The slightest touch from Cas sent shivers down his spine. “J-just try licking it. You know, if you want.”

“Mm, okay.”

The young man opened his mouth and let his tongue run along Dean’s throbbing, rock hard cock. The warm innocence made precum leak out.

“Gooood,” Dean cooed. “Keep doing that. Feels amazing.”

Cas smiled around his tongue and closed his eyes, licking and licking at the cock more.

“Now run it up to the tip and tickle it right here,” Dean instructed, using his own hand to point at his frenulum. “That part, you know.”

“Yes,” Cas agreed. He did just as Dean said and rubbed the tip of his tongue along Dean’s tender spot. The older man arched his back and shouted in pleasure.

“Fuck!! Cas!!” He grasped the bottom of his own dick and jerked off gently in time with Cas’ licks. He tried and tried to give gentle directions, but Cas had such a tasty little mouth that he had to take a firm lead. His free hand reached down to Cas’ head and grabbed his head, pulling him towards his cock more. “P-put your lips around the head! S-suck me off!”

Cas didn’t resist or argue but simply wrapped his wet mouth around the throbbing cockhead and pulled it inside. He sucked and sucked, trying his damnedest to get the man off. His salty, sticky precum was slurped up and enjoyed immensely. Having Dean’s love nectar touch his tongue was simply marvelous.

“S-suck my dick, baby—suck my dick!”

Dean forced Cas’ head down around him more as he thrust his hips at him. Cas worked and worked at it more, trying to get a good motion going with his head. He had seen guys in porn act like that and he wanted to be good like they were. Dean closed his eyes and blushed heavily, wrapped up in the moment so much that he suddenly began to face fuck Cas hard as he came. A big, hot load shot out of his dick in a couple ribbons and Cas just swallowed them up.

“Oh my God, oh my God,” Dean gasped. “Oh, oh fuck. Fuck!” His climax slowly faded and he relaxed his limbs. “Sh-shit. Get that out of your mouth, baby, please.”

Cas nodded to himself gently and let Dean’s deflating cock roll out. “Was I okay?” He asked softly.

“C-come here,” said Dean. He weakly grappled Cas’ shoulders and pulled him back chest-to-chest again. Cas seemed much happier now, and he gave Dean a sweet little hug. “Baby that was amazing. Amazing for anyone but _really_ amazing for a first time giving head. I’m sorry I was rough.”

Cas’ blue eyes flashed at Dean with a spark of naughtiness. “That’s fine,” he said, nodding. “I liked it.”

“Oh, yeah?”

“Yeah.”

Dean chuckled. “You know what I think you’d like?”

“Hm?”

“Toys.”

“Sex toys?”

“Yeah exactly. Wouldn’t you like to practice with something a little smaller? Maybe with a fun curve?”

Cas blushed at the thought. “Um, possibly?”

Dean grinned, creasing the skin around his eyes and looking Cas over. He tilted his head and moved in for a small kiss, even though Cas resented the idea of him tasting his morning breath. He reasoned with himself that Dean wouldn’t try to kiss him at all if he cared.

“We should go shopping.”

“Um, okay,” Cas agreed halfheartedly. He sat up more and squeezed his thighs around Dean’s waist, staring at him. “But, but you’re going to buy them for me?”

“Yeah, ‘course.”

“Thank you. That’s very nice.”

“Heheh well we _are_ using them together, so I can’t say it’s entirely selfless.”

Cas smiled. “That’s true,” he said in a small voice. Dean smirked and put another kiss on his lips, but them he looked slightly more serious and brought his hands to Cas’ cheeks.

“Think about it,” Dean purred, keeping a firm grasp on the tender young ass. “A long, vibrator jelly dong.”

Cas closed his eyes and tried to imagine what that would feel like. He had never even touched a dildo before. What would a vibrator feel like? Caressing his rectum with smooth, soft plastic and sending a delightful resonance within. “Mmm,” he hummed, licking his lips.

“Yeah, yeah, we’ll go shopping.”

“Today?” Cas asked.

“Sure, why not? You got anywhere you need to be?”

“I should go home.”

Dean sighed. “Really?”

“They’re worried about me, I’m sure.”

“Okay,” the older man agreed. Who was he to say no? “If that’s what you want.”

“Let me check my phone.”

“Where is it?”

“In my pants. I silenced it.”

Cas got out of bed, feeling much less cold now, and retrieved his phone from the pile of pants on the floor. His eyes widened when he looked at the screen.

“What?” Dean asked.

“I have…a lot of missed calls. And text messages. And voice mails.”

“Oh boy. You didn’t tell them?”

“I didn’t care.”

“Didn’t?”

Cas looked at Dean for a moment and thought _I don’t_ , but for some reason wasn’t brave enough to say it aloud. Instead, he dialed out to voicemail and listened to his parents bitching. And oh, how they bitched. “You’re out with that pedophile man again, aren’t you?” his mother said in a message. “He’s going to take advantage of you! Molest you! Corrupt you! You’re going to think it’s all about love and romance, but that’s just what he’s trying to get you to think! You’ll say, ‘oh but mom I love him,’ and that’s _wrong_. You don’t love an old man! He’s telling you that you do! Call me back and come home now!”

“What’d they say?” Dean asked. He turned on his side and propped his head on his hand. Cas kept the ringer off of his phone and set it on the nightstand.

“Just…just the typical banter.”

“You okay?”

Cas shook his head. “I’m not sure what to do.”

“If you don’t wanna go home don’t. They can’t force you. That’s the best part of being an adult.”

The younger of them returned to the bed and sat on the edge of it. “I’m worried.”

“Why?”

“I’m not sure.”

“So what? Go home or stay? You can stay all day if you want. All night, too. I have to work tomorrow but that’s it. You can hang out at the office if you want. But oh, you have school don’t you?”

“Almost done but yes, I still have class.”

Dean reached out and smoothed his hand down Cas’ bare back. He felt the curve of his skinny frame and smiled sadly. “I hate seeing you like this,” he muttered. Cas looked over his shoulder and asked why silently. “It breaks my heart. You’re a wonderful young man with a lot to offer, but you’re so hung up on pleasing your parents.”

Cas looked down again and sighed. His hands sat in his laps and fingers tapped together. “Then let’s go shopping,” he said.

“Really? Just like that? You sure?”

“Yes, let’s do it. When we’re done, I will have had enough time to decide what I’d like to do.”

Dean smiled. “Alright, cool. Wanna take a shower?”

“Yes.”

They both got out of bed together and made their way to the shower. Dean had a nice master bath up there, which Cas was so preoccupied with tears the night before to really take notice of. A skylight lit up the room without any electricity, but since it was still early in the day they had to turn the vanity on anyway. It had a great big mirror and a long counter beneath it, a nice faucet and very simple, straight forward decorations. A metal dish had a bar of lavender soap on it and a pump bottle of sanitizer sat adjacent. Cas assumed that all of his toiletries were neatly tucked away in the cabinet beneath since nothing else was sitting there.

Beside the sink was a long tub that sat within a wall of tile, giving it more counter space that most. A couple candles were along one side, while at the front near the spigots were bottles of oil, bubble bath and soap. Cas tried not to look at the tub, since it was a little “too romantic” in his head, although he couldn’t help but wonder what it was used for; did Dean like to soak alone, or did his old lovers join him? Was it romantic, practical or…or perhaps he had several guys in there at once?

“Come on,” Dean said, pulling Cas out of his bitter thoughts. The shower, which was a little standing cubical next to the tub, was already running and had steam coming out. Dean took his shirt off and went ahead inside, the held Cas’ arm and gently tugged him to follow.

“Yes, of course,” Cas said softly. He turned away from the tub and got inside the class enclosure. Hot water sprayed over both of them and Dean put his arms around Cas from behind. His chin went on the young man’s shoulder and he picked up a bar of soap the promptly began lathering his stomach. Cas giggled at the touch. He rolled his shoulders and closed his eyes halfway. It was so lovely, not to mention feeling Dean’s flaccid yet still massive meat rubbing against his ass.

“You know what I think?” Dean said, looking up.

“Yes?”

“I think you could get real kinky.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah, I think so. I think there’s a dirty boy hiding within this beautiful, pristine package.”

“I believe you’ve alluded to this before.”

Dean chuckled, running soap circles around Cas’ tender nipples now. “I know,” he hummed. “But I think it’s true. I mean, you like wearing panties, don’t you?”

“Yes,” Cas said quickly. Dean kissed him on the cheek.

“Nothing to be ashamed of,” he said. “Even the most masculine guys can like it. Not saying you’re masculine, though. Well unless you want to be.”

Cas shook his head. “I like being me. I don’t want any labels.”

“Yeah, yeah, I dig that,” Dean agreed. He put another kiss on the boy’s wet neck. “Then you be you and I’ll be me, okay?”

“Okay.” Now Cas turned to look at Dean and kissed him on the lips. They held it for a moment and when it broke Cas stared at him with red cheeks. Dean licked his lips. “Then let’s go shopping,” he said.


	12. Shopping is Stressful

 “I’ve never been to a store like this before,” Cas said, looking shy and nervous as usual while the two of them headed inside a sex shop.

“It’s no big deal,” Dean reassured him. “Nobody’s judging.”

“Mhhh,” Cas hummed uneasily.

The door opened up and they came through together, stepping onto cheap grey carpet that led to racks of toys and clothes. Cas blushed and covered his face with his hand.

“Babe, you’re gonna draw more attention to yourself by acting like that.”

Trying to behave normally, Cas relaxed his hand and instead took Dean’s arm. He held onto it like a lifesaver in the middle of a stormy sea.

“We’ll be quick,” Dean said as he took the young man over to a rack of toys. He looked at a couple then pointed at a dildo. It was bright pink, smooth and in a nice little box but Cas wished it was _slightly_ more discreet. “What’cha think?”

Cas pressed his lips together and squeezed Dean’s arm harder. “It’s good,” he said quietly, flushed with embarrassment.

“It vibrates. I think you’d like that.”

“Ohh,” Cas inhaled. He wondered how it might feel inside him. His hole clenched at the thought and he smiled. “O-okay.”

“Yeah? This? It’s smaller than me so it’ll get you nice and ready.” Dean grinned big and picked it up. “I’ll carry it for you.”

“Thank you.”

“What else?”

Cas’ eyes darted around the store. There were a couple other people, mostly alone, browsing the toys in such a casual manner that Cas felt embarrassed for _them_. Then he saw the women’s lingerie hanging around and stared at it with big eyes.

“You like that?” Dean asked, grinning.

“Yes,” Cas said softly.

“Let’s look. C’mon. We’ll find something cute for you.”

He took Cas over to the clothes racks in the middle of the store and started looking through them. Cas was nervous about this. He had decided that the other patrons were observing him and declared him strange for wanting women’s clothes. So he clung to Dean tighter and just watched him point items out.

“This is hot,” Dean said about a sheer pink teddy. “Would you wear something like this?”

“I guess so. I don’t know what it feels like, though.”

“Wanna try?” Cas nodded and Dean grinned. He put the teddy over his arm and kept browsing. “How ‘bout this one?” he asked about a red satin garter belt. “You ever worn stockings?”

“No.”

“Would you try?”

“Yes,” Cas said with a shy smile. “That might be fun.”

“Heheh alright, then let’s get this one, too. Anything else?”

“More panties?” Cas timidly suggested.

“Mmm okay. More cutie for your booty.”

Cas held his breath for a second and stared at Dean.

“What?” Dean asked.

“Are you sure you can afford it all?”

The older man laughed. “Yeah, ‘course. I wouldn’t offer if it was too much.”

“Oh, alright. Well, if you’re sure.”

“Definitely,” Dean reassured him. He leaned over and kissed him on the nose. “It’s been just me for a long time now. I’ve been saving up for someone else in my life.”

“Ohh,” Cas sighed with a dreamy smile. Dean was so wonderful, so perfect; the entire opposite of his family who never let him do anything or try anything.

“Here, pick out whatever looks good to you,” Dean said, pointing to a couple bins of panties.

“Um, alright then.”

So Cas had to touch them. But that was okay. He’d be touching them at home, too; and he noticed a man much older than Dean who had walked into a dressing room with a bunch of women’s clothing. He didn’t seem bothered at all by it so if that guy could, Cas could, too.

“I like these,” said Cas, pulling out pink thong. Dean watched him with hungry eyes. “And these. And these.” He ended up with six pairs, mostly lacy boyshorts but a couple thongs as well. His family didn’t approve of him buying clothes with any bright colors so he made sure to get the hottest, richest tones for the panties.

“We ready?” Dean asked. Cas hummed approvingly and they checked out then headed home. There was a lot to play with.

* * *

“Oooh, wow, that’s _hot!_ ”

Cas thought it would be appropriate to model some of their purchases from that day. He appreciated Dean’s generosity and didn’t want to leave it unrewarded, so once they got back to the townhouse, he undressed and slipped into the pink teddy along with a pair of lacy panties that nearly matched it. Dean was sitting up on the bed and Cas came out of the bathroom, shyly smiling and pulling at the flowery hem of his nighty.

“I could eat you,” Dean said. “Actually I _will_ eat you. Come here.”

Cas stepped over to the bed and climbed up onto his knees. He slowly crawled to Dean and sat between his legs.

“I never thought I’d dig a guy in clothes like that, to be honest,” Dean said.

“No? Does it look okay?”

“Cas, it looks _beautiful_. You have the perfect body for it. So smooth and curvy…” Dean leaned down and ran the backs of his fingers down Cas’ bare arm. He looked almost dizzy as he touched the young man. “You’re so god damn attractive.”

“Hah…I suppose.”

“So now what?” Dean asked, still rubbing Cas’ skin.

“What do you mean?”

“Will you stay the night again or go back home?”

Cas slumped his shoulders. “I really ought to return.”

“They’re assholes, though.”

“Y-yes, but they are my family and I do live there. They don’t even know where I am.”

“Maybe just give ‘em a call?”

Cas sighed. “But then they’ll _know_ where I am and be angry.”

“So? They can’t do shit.”

“That is true…oh, I don’t know! What do I do!?” Cas closed his eyes in pain and held his head with both hands. But Dean grabbed him and pulled him into his lap, giving him a big, comforting hug.

“Shh, shh,” he cooed, rubbing Cas’ back. “Just give ‘em a call. That way they’ll know. And if they’re mad then tough shit. At least they know you aren’t dead, right?”

“Right…I’ll do that, then.”

“That’s my boy!” Dean reached over to the nightstand where they had left Cas’ phone and tossed it to him. “And I’ll be right here if you need any backup or support, okay?”

“Mmh,” Cas acknowledged with a nod. He looked at his phone with a sad, worried face but dialed out to his parents anyway. He called the house phone and Gabriel answered.

“Bro?” he said.

“Hello.”

“Hey where are you?”

“With my friend.”

“That old guy?”

“Um…yes.”

“Oh okay. Mom and dad have been freaking out.”

“I’m sorry. Are they home?”

“No, they’re out having dinner at some place special or whatever. They sorta decided that it’s nicer without you?”

“Ah…”

Cas looked down at Dean and frowned. Dean rubbed his thigh.

“You want me to tell them you called?” Gabriel asked.

“If you want to, I suppose. But, but tell them I’m not sure when I will return.”

“Oh okay. You alright, bro?”

“Yes,” Cas said, smiling just a bit now. “I’m very good.”

“Cool.”

“I will talk to you later. See you.”

“Bye.”

Cas hung up the phone and plopped it onto the bed before relaxing into Dean’s arms.

“Now how hard was that?” Dean asked.

“They don’t want me home,” Cas sighed.

“What?”

“Did you hear what Gabriel said?”

“No, not really.”

“They’re out having a nice dinner. They think it’s better without me there.”

“Oh what the fuck?!” Dean yelled. He furrowed his brow greatly and hugged Cas tighter. “Who would ever think that?!”

“ _Them_ ,” Cas said with an emotionally exhausted whine.

“Aww, baby, I am _so_ sorry they treat you like that,” Dean said. “You really don’t deserve it at all.” Cas just hummed sadly and nuzzled into the crook of Dean’s neck.

“I don’t know.”

“I do and you don’t.”

Dean smoothed his palms down the lacy back on the teddy and rubbed around the hem. It was so soft, just like Cas’ skin. He let his hands run down to his ass so he could cup the cheeks, playing with the lingerie there, too. Cas just closed his eyes and remained tucked into the man’s neck, breathing slowly with the occasional “I’m so tired of this” sigh.

“You at least feel happy with me?” Dean asked, his voice softer now.

“Y-yes,” Cas muttered.

“Do you?”

“I do.”

“Good. ‘Cause I don’t think I can even be as nice as you deserve.”

“Why?”

“You should be given everything you want, and put on a fucking altar.” Dean ran his fingers underneath the edge of Cas’ panties and rubbed his cheeks. “You outta have the most amazing, incredible life anybody can give you.”

“Oh, Dean, that’s silly,” Cas chuckled.

“Why you say that?”

“Because there’s no reason for it all.”

“Sure there is. You’re a wonderful, beautiful, intelligent person.”

“But many people are and they don’t have everything they want.”

“Ah, baby, I’m just being dramatic.”

“Oh…” Cas didn’t understand.

“Don’t worry about it.”

“Well, I, I suppose I won’t.”

“You hungry?”

“Only a little.”

“Can I get you something?”

“If you want. But not much.”

“Alright, hang tight.” Dean pulled his hands out of Cas’ panties, slid him off his body then rolled out of bed. “Be right back,” he said as he dashed out of the bedroom and downstairs. He quickly slapped together a sandwich for Cas, along with a glass of milk and a couple cookies. It didn’t take very long and he was back in the bedroom. Cas had sat up with his back to the headboard, knees to his chest and arms wrapped around his legs. He looked surprised.

“I said only a little,” he hummed, eyes wide.

“This is only a little,” Dean said. He laughed and sat down beside him. “Here ya go.”

“Oh, Dean…thank you. I can’t eat it all, though.”

“That’s fine. Whatever you can, or whatever you want.”

Dean held the milk and watched Cas as he took a couple nibbles of the sandwich, smiling and blushing at how good it was, then had one of the cookies and left the rest. They swapped the plate for the glass and Dean finished his food.

“I think you’re a better cook than you give yourself credit,” Cas said, sipping his milk softly.

“Yeah?”

“Mmh. I think so. Even that sandwich was lovely.”

“Heheh, thanks. That’s sweet.”

“I’m being honest, that’s all.”

“Well thanks for being honest,” Dean grinned and kissed Cas on the cheek. He finished up the food and left the plate on the nightstand. “What else do you wanna do now? Play with your new toy?”

“Umm…perhaps not right away,” Cas said nervously. He put the glass down and looked scared.

“It’s cool. When you’re ready. We can keep it in the box for a long time if you want.”

“No, no, maybe tomorrow?”

“Whatever you want.”

Dean put an arm around Cas and held him close.

“Could we watch the television for a bit?”

“Yeah, that’s cool.” He got the remote and flipped on the flatscreen against the wall, then handed it to Cas. “You pick.”

“Oh!” Cas gasped. “But I’m not so sure of what’s on. I’ve always had fairly strict limitations on the television.”

“Jeez, that’s rough,” Dean sighed. “But okay. Let’s just see what’s on the movie channels.”

“Alright.”

Cas snuggled up against Dean’s embrace and they sat like that through a movie and a half. They didn’t talk much and just enjoyed each other’s company. Cas closed his eyes and fell asleep on Dean’s side, still wearing his pink teddy.

 


	13. New Tricks, Old Games

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's been taking me so long to update. I have a million bajillion things on my "to write" list, not getting any of them done. I'm frickin' overwhelmed with everything and my attention span is ZERO.

Dean woke up before the alarm which was probably a good thing, considering he forgot to ask Cas when he needed to leave for school. The young man was still asleep, snoring softly and cradled with Dean’s arms. A quick peek at the clock revealed it to be quarter after five, so it was close enough to actual wake up that Dean wouldn’t really be able to sleep more. He ran both of his hands beneath the back of Cas’ nighty, smoothing over his warm flesh and squeezing him closer with a slow exhale. Cas’ fingers tensed just a bit against Dean’s chest.

“Mmmhh…” the younger of them purred. His eyes remained shut but he turned his head to the other side and smacked his lips, shifted his body in Dean’s embrace then muttered, “whhadddimmeissitt…”

“Almost five thirty,” Dean told him in a quiet voice. He kept rubbing his back. “You need to be up soon?”

“Leave at…mmhh…six forty-five.”

“Want more time to snooze?”

Cas shook his head and grunted in opposition. He then slid up closer to Dean’s face, grasping his shoulders for support and picked up his head to stare at him. As his big, bright eyes opened up, Dean looked back and smiled contentedly. He also put one hand on the top of Cas’ hair and pawed around in it. His messy mop was super adorable.

“What do you wanna do?” Dean asked.

Cas gave a naughty smile and properly straddled the muscular man. “Play around,” he hummed. Dean raised his eyebrows and agreed that it was a good idea.

They ground their bodies against each other to pick up some early morning heat, grunting in the depths of their throats. Cas clung onto Dean’s shoulders and did his best to work his hips, rubbing his dick as it pulled the panties tight, meanwhile Dean placed both of his hands onto Cas’ waist and helped him ride.

“What do you feel like doing?” Dean asked.

“Um, well,” Cas began nervously. He blushed and smiled real shy. “I want to try my new toy.”

“Oh yeah?” Dean verified with big eyes. “You sure?” Cas nodded. “ _Awesome_. Hop off and get on your back, it’ll be better that way.”

“Alright,” Cas agreed. He did so and spread his for Dean who immediately went between them, sitting upon his knees. In the dark of the room, he groped around in the nightstand for Cas’ new toy which was still unwrapped. Once he found it he pulled it from the packaging and popped batteries into the base.

“I’m not gonna use the vibrator right away,” Dean said. “We’ll warm you up and then do it. How’s that sound?”

“Good, I guess,” said Cas. He nervously awaited any kind of new sensation that was headed his way. “I’m not sure how it feels though, so it’s all assumptions.”

“That’s fine. You’ll find out.” Dean winked even though Cas couldn’t see him that well, pulled down the lacy panties then got some lubricant on his fingers and started to prod around on the outside of Cas’ hole.

“OH!” Cas gasped immediately. His body jolted in surprise.

“This okay?” Dean asked.

“Yes!” the younger men whined, clenching his toes.

Dean slowly eased a finger within him and rubbed inside gently. He also leaned down and began placing soft, tiny kisses against Cas’ inner thigh.

“Ohh, ohh gosh!” Cas squealed. His hips rolled a bit and he tightened his ring of muscle around Dean’s finger.

“Try to relax, baby,” Dean cooed between kisses. He dug his finger around deeper then brought a second one inside.

“Aah!! Sh-shit!” Cas moaned as he tossed his head back. “Dean!”

“Mmmm, feel good?”

“Y-yes!!”

“Wanna try the toy?”

“Mmhh!! Yeees!!”

Overcome with a hot, sticky desire, Cas desperately clawed at the sheets as he rocked his pelvis in Dean’s direction. He needed more of this. Now.

So Dean, sensing Cas’ incredible lusting, picked up the dildo and rubbed it down with plenty of lube. He smeared a bit more onto Cas’ hole, then held the toy right up against it. Cas yelped “I need it!”

“Heheh alright,” said Dean. As he inserted the pink plastic, Cas howled and moaned in great pleasure, writhing his body back and forth, twitching his skinny legs and heavy achy breaths from his gasping chest.

“Dean! Deaaan!” he cried, taking more and more of the dildo’s length. Dean brought his lips to Cas’ tight balls and kissed them gently.

“You wanna see some magic happen?” Dean whispered.

“Y-yes,” Cas groaned in reply, turning his head from side to side.

“Alright,” Dean said. He put more wet kisses onto Cas’ balls and stared up at him. “Just relax and enjoy, okay?”

Cas pressed his lips together and nodded, breathing heavy with achy expectation. Gripping the dildo securely, Dean tilted it at the perfect angle to press right onto Cas’ sweet spot. The young man shouted in ecstasy the moment it struck gold, making him claw the sheets tighter and push his hips down. “Oooh!!” Cas moaned. “Aaaah!!”

With a smirk on his face, Dean rubbed and rolled the dildo harder, exerting the precise amount of pressure against Cas’ nerves to make his cock twitch and jump. Dean sucked a bit of tender skin into his mouth.

“Ohh, gosh! Gosh!” Cas yelled, trembling. The dildo-prodding continued at a smooth, fluid like rate and his moans grew in volume and length.

“Relax,” Dean purred, nipping at the boy’s sack. “Just relax.”

“Mmhh, hhhmm, y-yes!” Cas groaned.

Then Dean twisted the base of the dildo and turned on a low vibration. This rocked Cas’ world so much that his eyes shot open and he hollered as he gasped, staring at the ceiling in somewhat disbelief. “SH-SHIT!” he screamed as hot cum slowly oozed from his dick. “OH MY GOD! OH MY GOD!” he was crying out over and over again, humming in his throat and flushing hot all over. Dean watched him with an almost sinister smile. “Good?” he asked.

“OH! OH! W-WHAT! WHAT IS THIS!!!”

“Sshh, I’m just milking you,” Dean cooed with more kisses to Cas’ balls, this time taking some down to his perineum. The vibrations wiggled throughout the young body and Cas whimpered, whining in such desperation that he thought he might explode. Another thick string of cum gooped out of his throbbing cock.

“OH GOD! OH GOD!” Cas screamed.

“Mmmmm…”

Dean turned the vibrations up, rubbing against Cas’ sweet spot harder. His tongue flicked across the little throbbing taint, tasting the tingle of light sweat. Cas gasped and arched his back more, wetting his lips over and over as moans continued to trickle out.

“D-Dean!” he cried. “F-fuck me!!”

Dean’s eyes opened wide and he turned off the vibrator, peering at Cas in surprise. “Oh, yeah?” he asked. “You sure?”

“Yes!” Cas gasped. Trying to catch his breath, he sat up on his elbows and caught Dean’s gaze. “Please.”

“Can’t argue with that,” Dean said as he pulled the toy out. Cas made a little squeal then tried spreading his legs more, but Dean quickly sat up and grabbed those skinny knees and pulled them together instead. He hooked them onto his shoulders. After peeling out of his night clothes, he set the dildo on the nightstand and took a condom from the drawer, rolled it down his cock and held it right along Cas’ crack. Some more lubricant was slathered over the shaft and a bit more on Cas’ throbbing hole. “Nervous?”

“No,” Cas said rather confidently. “I’m ready.”

Dean touched the tip of his cock to Cas’ hole and slowly eased inside. The one hand held his dick at the base while the other grabbed Cas’ opposing thigh. The ring of muscle stretched eagerly around the massive cock, sending ripples of deep, pulsating pleasure throughout the young man’s body.

“Ohh-ho,” Cas groaned with a wince. He tried reaching forward to touch Dean, but fell short and ended up clutching at his own thighs desperately. Dean made enough progress within him to let his fist off so he could hold both of Cas’ knees, then he was able to start thrusting lightly.

“Feel good?” Dean asked as he grunted within the depths of his throat. “Like it?”

Cas nodded, moaning little whimpers constantly. His fingers tensed and clawed at his bony thighs while Dean fucked him harder. The big, muscular and inked up man drove his massive cock into that newly explored hole with such fucking skill the Cas couldn’t even think of a way to express the sensations; all he could do was writhe and squirm, squeal and whine.

But soon Dean leaned down and pushed Cas’ legs nearly to his chest, pinning him down as his muscles worked hard to slam into him. He got his face right up to Cas’ and, as he breathed heavy, hot gasps whispered, “You like how my cock feels in you?”

“Ohhh,” Cas hummed, swallowing stiffly as he tried to focus on Dean’s chiseled face in the tiny glimmer of approaching daylight. He huffed with each one of Dean’s thrusts, clenching his hot hole around the shaft and bucking his hips instinctively into the feeling.

“You like how it feels when I fuck you? Huh?” Dean asked, grinning almost this time. Beads of sweat began to trickle down his face now, feeling so hot that he thought they might evaporate against his skin. Cas’ fingers weakly attempted to touch Dean’s waist. His head jerked with the fucking.

“I like it,” Cas choked, lips parted expectantly for a kiss. Dean grabbed at the young man’s shoulders and rubbed them.

“Yeah? Good? Good?”

“Oh, oh Dean! So good!”

“Mmmm yeah, your ass feels amazing on my cock. Your ass was _made_ for my cock.”

They continued to hump at each other, filling the room with thick sex sweat and rocking the bed loudly. Dean’s core was firm as he wham-wham-whammed into Cas’ innocent ass. He dove his face into the young neck in front and sucked at the sweaty flesh. “I’m gonna cum,” Dean moaned. Cas’ breath hitched and he closed his eyes, nuzzling his head against Dean’s smooth, short hair. “I-I’m gonna cum, Cas.”

“I like this,” Cas squealed. His hands managed to slide up Dean’s waist and grip his skin slightly.

“M-me, too,” Dean admitted. His breathing went crazy as he fucked the boy impossibly fast, causing Cas to erupt with voice-cracking yelps. “Ohh, FUCK!” Dean screamed.

“Ahh! AHH!” Cas cried. Dean managed to fuck him so good and so perfectly that when the older man came, Cas did, too.

For a moment time froze and they simply held onto each other, breathing nearly stopped as their bodies retained a strange heaviness. Then it all relaxed and Dean flopped down onto Cas’ stomach. He tried not to overwhelm him and Cas was pretty alright with it. He hugged Dean and smiled.

“How was it?” Dean asked, wetting his lips.

“I liked it.”

“Yeah? I did, too. It was amazing. Holy _shit_.”

Cas nuzzled his face against Dean’s, getting him to turn so that they faced and could kiss softly. “I loved it,” Cas whispered. He stared at the flickering eyes that watched him just as intently. “I love you.”

The second those words came out, Cas locked up and realized he had said something stupid. He turned his face away from Dean and closed his eyes. “ _Sorry_ …”

“Why are you sorry?” Dean asked. He took Cas’ face in his hand and tried to turn him back, but sensing the young man had no intention of doing so, he let it go.

“That was foolish,” Cas admitted. His breath was still uncatchable.

“No it wasn’t,” Dean said. He smiled slightly. “Why you think that?”

Cas shook his head. “I don’t know you that well.”

“So?”

“I don’t know. It seems stupid.”

“No, it’s not. I just, well, I think you mean what you said but you’re too young to really understand. Does that make sense?”

Cas nodded. He whispered “I’m sorry” again then wanted to get up, so they did. They tried to put that awkwardness aside and get ready for the day.

“School, right?”

“Yes.”

“Will you come back?”

Cas thinned his lips. By now he was at the front door, getting his car keys and preparing to head out. It embarrassed him slightly that he was wearing the same clothes, but they had been washed and it wasn’t like he went to school the day before.

“I need to see my family,” Cas said. Dean looked disappointed.

“Okay,” he said sadly. “But um, you’re welcome to come back anytime, you hear me? If you need some distance or just want to hang out and fuck. Whatever. I’m here.”

Cas stared at Dean and smiled very, very faintly. “I will return, of course. It changes nothing between us. I just have an obligation to be with my family.”

Of course Dean didn’t agree, but it wouldn’t do any good to argue with him. A few warm kisses and Cas went on his way.

* * *

School was normal and fine but Cas’ return home was, as guessed, not so fine. He came back to find his mother there, sitting in the living room with her arms folded and wearing a scowl.

“Where have you been?!” she snapped.

“I was with my friend,” Cas said, trying to remain as calm as possible. He took of his shoes at the door and dropped his book bag there as well.

“That _man?_ That creep?”

Cas nodded, even though he didn’t like to agree with Dean being a creep.

“You’ve had sex with him, haven’t you, Castiel?”

“…yes.”

“OH!” his mother screamed. She looked absolutely horrified and shot up from the sofa. “He’s using you! He’s a filthy pervert and he’s _using_ you!”

“Mother—I—came home to make you happy…”

“If you’re so concerned with making me happy, you should never have left! I took the entire day off of work because I’ve been so _worried sick_ about where you are, what’s happening, what this _fucking pedophile_ has been doing to you! I lost _money_ today, Castiel, all because of you!”

Cas tried not to sob. He couldn’t. He couldn’t lose his cool. Instead, he stiffly walked away from Mrs. Novak and went upstairs to his room.

“Don’t you dare ignore me!” she continued yelling but didn’t pursue him at all. “Michael is coming home this week! You can’t be whoring yourself out to some filthy, piece of shit human scum while your brother is taking time out of his precious schedule to see you!”

Cas covered his ears and closed the door to his room. He simply wasn’t going to listen to any of that. Dean wasn’t a piece of trash and certainly wasn’t using him for sex.

His room seemed empty now. He didn’t have nice furniture or pictures of classic cars framed on the walls. He didn’t have a beautiful black walnut liquor cabinet or a leather sofa. He didn’t have a drawer full of condoms and lube. Nothing there was nice; just the twin bed, bookshelf, desk and small dresser. As he crawled to his bed and climbed on, he wondered why he came home.

“Because they’re your family and they support you,” he said to himself. The tears came anyway. Unfortunately, he began to second guess if they were right after all; was Dean taking advantage of him?

Dean had said he was too young to understand what love was so maybe he was too young to understand that an older man was using him? His heart ached at this sentiment. Dean was _so_ nice to him. He was so caring and wonderful. It was impossible for him to be a creep…right?


	14. Big Brother

School was the same the next day except Dean texted Cas a couple times. Early in the morning he wrote, “everthing ok?” and after no answer, a few hours later he wrote “Cas?”

“I’m fine.”

“K. I miss u.”

“I miss you, too.”

Cas sighed as he stared down at the screen. It hurt him to be cold but he needed some distance from Dean in order to make sure he wasn’t being used for sex, assuming Cas could somehow tell. None of it meant he liked Dean less but he just had to be certain.

When he drove home at the end of the school day, he pulled up in the driveway to find Michael’s car there. For some reason he thought that his older brother would be back later. He swallowed stiffly and walked inside.

Of course, the rest of Cas’ family was encircling Michael in the living room. Everyone had a big smile on their face as they showered the eldest with adoration and pride. They practically ignored Cas’ entrance.

“And your girlfriend, Mikey? How is she?” Mrs. Novak asked, batting her eyelids like a teenager.

“Great, mom. She’s really great.” Michael looked over his shoulder at Cas and grinned. “Well hey there, little brother. How are you?”

“Fine,” Cas said quickly. He took his shoes off and went to go upstairs, but Michael stopped him.

“Where are you going?” he asked.

“To my room” said Cas. “I have a lot of homework.”

Michael turned to his parents and, in a suspiciously kind tone said, “Mom, dad? Would you mind if I had a little one –on-one with Castiel?”

“Certainly,” said Mr. Novak. “Take your time.”

“Thanks. Hey, Cas, let’s go talk upstairs.”

“Alright,” Cas said nervously. It was never good when he asked for “one-on-one” with Cas. He wanted to avoid it but between _No Other Choice Avenue_ and _Condescending Parental Glare Road_ , Cas had to hold his breath and head down _Doom Court_.

“Mom and dad tell me you’re seeing someone now,” Michael said, once they got into Cas’ room and he closed the door. A big, sarcastic grin was on the older brother’s face.

“Um, sort of,” Cas hummed.

“What’s her name?” Cas didn’t answer. “Come on, it’s a simple question. What’s the lady’s name?”

“Um, well, about that—“

“Ohh, you can’t answer that because it’s not a lady, is it?” Michael said, taking a few steps towards Cas, who insisted on keeping his back turned. “Huh? Am I right?” Cas pressed his lips together and nodded slowly. “What’s his name?”

Still no answer.

“What’s his name, Cas?”

“ _Dean_.”

“Oh Jesus fuck,” Michael groaned. “I _thought_ they said it was the mechanic. Are you crazy? What’s wrong with you?”

Cas tightened up his entire body. “Nothing,” he said softly. “I love him.”

“Oh, God,” Michael hissed. “Cas! He’s older than me and a _lot_ older than you. You don’t love him. He’s just a creep. You fucked him?”

Cas didn’t answer. He hugged his arms to his abdomen and tried to relax. Michael suddenly grabbed him by the shoulders and made them face together. Cas avoided eye contact.

“Did you fuck him?” Michael persisted.

“Why does it matter?” Cas asked weakly. Michael’s fingers tug into his bony shoulders.

“Because I care about you,” Michael said, glaring angrily. “You’re my little brother. I don’t want you getting use by some _sick fuck_!!” He let go of Cas’ shoulders but pushed back real hard, sending him to the wall. Cas let out a cry of pain and slid to the floor, hugging himself.

“He’s not a sick fuck,” Cas hummed. Michael took a few steps closer and kicked at his brother’s legs. Cas yelped.

“Dean _Winchester_ ,” Michael hissed, kicking Cas in the side. “I went to school with his _brother_.” Another kick. Cas tried to be quiet. “Even Sam said Dean was a _sick fuck_.”

“Stop!” Cas cried out. He clutched his ribs in pain. Michael ceased his kicks.

“What’s that?”

“S-stop!” he said, resisting an attack of tears.

Michael knelt down next to his brother and faked a sympathetic face. “Oh, jeez, you’re right, Castiel.”

“Huh?”

“I’m wrong here.”

“Y-you are?”

“Yeah,” Michael said. He softly touched Cas’ side after the younger man flinched. “Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay,” Cas apologized. His body relaxed.

“I have no reason to be mad at you,” Michael went on to explain. He stood up and stared down at Cas very seriously. “I should be mad at Dean Winchester.”

Cas gazed up at him in horror.

“Next time you see that asshole, tell him that I’m not leaving without having a little one-on-one with him.” Michael glared at Cas then angrily left him alone in his room.

“ _Noooo…_ ” Cas howled to himself very sadly. He hugged his legs and rocked on the floor for a while, heart racing and mind going a million miles per hour. All he could think about was how he pulled Dean into some real shit, getting involved with him. What could he do?

“Can I come over?” he texted Dean with shaking hands.

“Yeah ne time. U ok?”

“Yes. I just want to see you. I’ll be there soon.”

“Cool :]”

Cas sighed and managed to put together a bag of clothes. He packed enough for several days, along with some basic toiletries and one of his stuffed animals. He waited for the downstairs to grow quiet then he slipped down and out to his car, miraculously not getting any attention. At least as far as he could tell.

“I missed you,” was the first thing Dean said after he answered the door. He gave Cas a tight hug and brought him close, but let go when Cas winced in pain. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Cas said. “My stomach is just a little sore. Something I ate. Don’t hug me so hard, sorry.”

“Aww, okay. Don’t be sorry. Come in.” Cas nodded and followed Dean inside. “You hungry, baby?”

“No.”

“Sure?”

“Yes.”

“What do you wanna do?”

Cas looked at Dean with sad eyes and softly told him, “I want to lay down.”

“Tired?”

“Yes…”

“Alright, let’s just go upstairs.”

Dean offered to take Cas’ overnight bag as they went to his room, then he put it on his dresser and got out of his pants.

“Been missing you like crazy.”

“It hasn’t been all that long.”

“It’s felt like forever to me,” Dean sighed.

Cas immediately went to the bed and climbed on top, carefully laying down on his back with his hands over his stomach. Dean sat next to him and rubbed his bicep.

“Poor baby,” he cooed. Cas closed his eyes and leaned his head against Dean’s thigh. “Family treating you right?”

“Yes,” Cas said a little too quickly.

“You sure about that, baby?”

“Yes of course. Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Because they never treat you right.”

“Oh, yes…well…well my older brother came home.”

“Michael?”

“Him, yes.”

“Alright, and? Did something happen?”

“N-no, not exactly.”

“Oh,” Dean said, looking at Cas oddly. He continued to rub his shoulder. “Well okay then.” Looking at Cas’ stomach, he pondered for a moment then suggested, “Hey, how about I run you a bath? That’ll help you feel better.”

“Um, okay. That’s fine I guess. But I would like to bathe alone.”

“Sure,” said Dean. “I feel you. Lemme go prep it.”

He hopped off the bed and went into the bathroom where he cleaned out the already pristine tub, plugged it up and began to draw hot water into it. “You like foam bath?” he called out.

“That’s fine,” Cas answered.

“Heheh, alright,” Dean said a little softer. He squirted a couple pumps of lavender bubble bath into the running water. It foamed up right away and smelled very nice. He left it to fill up and returned to the bedroom.

“Um, Dean?” Cas asked.

“Yeah?”

“Do you get on well with your brothers?”

“Sure. Why?”

“Well, um, see,” Cas blushed a bit. He hesitated and sat up slowly, making sure not to hurt his side.

“What?”

“Michael said he knew your brother Sam in high school. And he also said that Sam called you a ‘sick fuck.’”

“What?!” Dean yelled. He stared at Cas in disbelief. “That’s a lie. Sammy would _never_ say that about me.”

Cas shrugged. “That’s what he said.”

“No offense, but your brother lied.” Looking quite offended, Dean folded his arms and scoffed.

“I’m sorry,” said Cas.

“No, no, it’s not your fault,” Dean said. He went to Cas’ side and pet his head. “Baby, stop blaming yourself.”

“I’m sorry.”

“You gotta stop apologizing, okay?”

Cas looked at Dean and frowned. “Okay,” he said.

“Now let’s get you into the tub. How’s that sound?”

Cas smiled a little. “It’s sounds good, thanks.” He got off of the bed and went over to the bathroom.

“You want some privacy?” Dean asked.

“Please.”

“Sure, no problem.”

Dean kissed Cas on the lips real gentle then let him close himself in the bathroom. There he undressed and got into the steamy, bubbly water with a sigh. His side ached but felt good when he was submerged in the hot bath. He stared up at the skylight and watched a couple clouds float by in the evening blue. _Should I tell Dean what Michael said_? He wondered. The answer wasn’t clear.

On the other side of the door, Dean went downstairs and into the kitchen. He turned on the stove to heat up his kettle then got a mug and a bag of herbal tea. “This’ll help his tummy,” Dean said aloud to himself with a smile. He waited for the kettle to go off then poured some hot water into the mug. He stirred in a tiny bit of honey then headed back upstairs.

As he passed through the living room, he noticed the bushes on the other side of his bay window wiggled. He slowed down and watched for a moment. It seemed very strange. So strange, in fact, that he set the tea on an end table and opened up the front door, stuck his head out and looked around. Immediately the bushed rustled but then ceased. It sounded like either a person or a very large animal had run off. Dean didn’t like that one bit. He closed the door and made sure to lock it, then took the mug in his hands and went back upstairs.

“Made you some tea,” Dean said as he went right into the bathroom. Cas jumped and make a squeak, then hid his abdomen in the bubbles. “Sorry! Didn’t mean to startle you.”

Cas blushed and smiled. “That’s fine. Thank you.”

“I’ll just set it here,” Dean said, placing the mug on the site of the bathtub. It was set in sort of a brick of tiles so it had a lot of flat space around the actual tub. He sat down on the side and smiled at Cas. “How you feeling?”

“Alright,” the young man replied.

“Want me to help wash you?”

Cas shook his head quickly. “No!” he said. Dean looked surprised and a bit worried.

“Babe, you sure you’re alright?”

“Yes, yes of course. I just, I just don’t feel much like being touched.”

“Alright,” Dean agreed. “I get it. Sure, whatever makes you feel comfortable. Can I still give you a kiss?”

“Absolutely.”

Dean grinned and leaned into Cas’ lips. They closed their eyes and slowly frenched. “Mmm,” Dean groaned against his lover’s lips. He put his hand on Cas’ cheek and pulled him in a little, but the younger of them felt a pinch of pain and winced.

“Cas?” Dean asked, staring at him in deep concern.

“I’m fine,” said Cas. “Just my tummy. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, remember?” Dean stroked Cas’ cheek with the back of his hands. “No reason to worry. I’ll let you finish up alone.”

“Thank you. Can you bring my bag in here?”

“Sure.”

Cas remained in the tub for ten more minutes or so, drinking the lovely tea and enjoying the soak. He felt it suitable to leave and toweled off then got into a clean t-shirt and pair of briefs. He stepped into the bedroom to find Dean underneath the covers already, watching TV.

“Thought we’d have an early night,” Dean said with a smile. He patted the space next to him. “You look exhausted.”

“I am,” said Cas. He climbed into bed and cuddled up against Dean. It would seem that the older man was naked. That was nice. It felt good. His body was firm and well groomed, smelled nice and was incredibly inviting. Dean put a kiss on Cas’ forehead and asked “why don’t you strip down, too?”

“I will. I’m still a little cold.”

“Makes sense.”

They watched TV for a little while, then Dean noticed Cas yawning a lot and decided to turn it off. The room grew completely dark and Cas took off his clothes. Once he was nude, he turned his back to Dean’s chest and rubbed into him. Dean growled in the back of his throat and spooned Cas, rubbing his thigh slowly.

“So sexy,” Dean whispered. He put kisses on Cas’ neck. “I missed your hot little body.”

Cas let out a soft moan and leaned back to tell him, “I missed your hot big body.”

“Heheh, cute,” Dean said. His nose nuzzled along Cas’ jawline as he pressed more tiny kisses. “Guess you don’t wanna fool around if your stomach hurts, huh?”

“No, really not.”

“That’s fine. Some other time. It’s nice to just cuddle.”

“Mmm,” Cas hummed in agreement. He was happy to be back in Dean’s bed, but something just didn’t feel right. Maybe it was the big bruise on his ribs.


	15. Honesty is Best

They slept through the night in that exact fashion; pressed together and embracing tightly. Cas woke up rather quickly and opened his eyes. He wiggled and stretched slightly to see how his bruise was doing. It was definitely still going to show up but it felt slightly better. His insides didn’t ache and it was less tender.

“Stay…” Dean grumbled, holding Cas more securely after he moved.

“I will,” was Cas’ soft reply. Then Dean’s body twitched and he realized the man was still asleep. They rested for a bit longer then Dean actually awoke.

“Mmmm…Caaaas…” His big hand ran down the young man’s waist and thigh, rubbing and palming in slow circles. They were both so warm and every touch felt good.

“Good morning,” Cas said.

“Morning. How’s your tummy feel?”

“Better, but I’m tired. I hope I’m not getting sick.”

“Aww, do you feel like you might?”

Dean gently pulled Cas onto his back and he sat up, but Cas made sure to keep the covers over his body. The back of Dean’s hand lay over the young man’s forehead. “Don’t feel warm.”

“Good,” Cas replied. He watched Dean in the faint light of approaching dawn. “But I’m going to stay home from school.”

“That bad?”

Cas nodded.

Dean leaned down and kissed his neck softly, rubbing both his shoulders with a sigh. “My poor little angel…”

“I’ll be fine,” Cas said, closing his eyes and moaning very lightly from Dean’s kisses.

“You want anything to eat?”

“No, thank you.”

“Sure? Tea? Water?”

“That’s alright.”

“Well, okay.” Dean sat up and rolled his fingers through Cas’ hair. “Make yourself at home. If you feel like eating, have anything you want. If I have secrets you won’t have the key.” He chuckled a bit and Cas smiled. “Call me if need to. I’ll try to get home early.”

“You don’t have to.”

“Yeah but I want to.”

A kiss went on Cas’ forehead then Dean got up went about his morning routine. Cas watched him get dressed then they said their goodbyes and he was on his way. Cas closed his eyes and dozed off. Somehow he managed to fall asleep until noon, which was an incredible feat alone. His parents never offered him the chance to sleep in but to be perfectly honest, he had to give them some credit here; he felt like shit now.

So he rolled out of bed, put Dean’s robe on and wandered downstairs. Coffee was still in the maker and Dean had set out a couple boxes of tea, a clean mug, a spoon, the sugar bowl and a bottle of honey. The temptation was strong and Cas’ stomach was a little hungry so he turned the kettle on and placed a teabag into the mug. On the next counter he saw that Dean had left out half a loaf of bread, a butter dish with a knife on top, a clean plate and a drinking glass. Cas smiled to himself when he saw it all. What did he deserve to have Dean treat him like a guest at a five star hotel? As the water boiled, he made some toast then ate everything quickly in the kitchen. While he stood in there, the houseline (which he didn’t even realize until then that Dean had one) rang. He looked over at the phone on the wall and saw the caller ID said “WINCHESTER, SAMUEL.”

That was one of Dean’s brothers, of course, but Cas couldn’t just answer it nor would he want to. Talking to a stranger on the phone by choice? No way. So it rang and rang then went to voicemail. It clicked and Dean’s message played real loud. “ _Hey, this is Dean’s landline. You know what to do. CLICK!_ ”

**BEEEEEP**

“ _Dean, it’s Sam. Get this; the second publisher picked up my book! I’m so stoked that I had to tell you even though…oh, right, you’re at work. I guess—oh---damn—CLICK!_

Cas chuckled. He wondered if everyone in Dean’s family was nice. So far he had no reason not to think that way. Promptly after eating, he dragged himself back to bed and watched TV.

* * *

“That’s $195. Thanks.”

“No, no, Dean. Thank _you_. Also, we wanted to give you this.”

“Oh? What is it?”

A middle aged client of Dean’s handed him a mason jar over the counter. It had an orange ribbon tied around it. “Nectarine marmalade,” the woman said. “We make a big batch for the farmer’s market.”

“Awesome! Looks great. Thanks!”

“You’ve taken such good care of our cars, it’s the least we can do. Maybe we’ll see you at the market?”

Dean put the jar of preserves down near the register and smiled big. “When is it?”

“Tomorrow.”

“I’ll try to make it.”

“That would be wonderful. Thank you so much, Dean. Take care.”

“Yeah see ya.”

The woman waved as she left and the doorbell chimed on her exit. Dean took a seat in the beat up leather recliner behind the register and toyed with the marmalade. How cool was that? He wondered if it was something Cas would like, and then he wondered if going to the farmer’s market would be, too.

He stared for a little while, listening to Bobby rattle around inside the bays while an 8 track of Conway Twitty played. Then he was startled back into reality when the bell went off again with the door opening. A young man stepped inside with his hands in his pockets.

“Hey, you’re Michael Novak aren’t you?” Dean asked.

“Sure, that’s me,” Michael said with a slight smile. “Glad you remembered.”

“Yeah ‘course. How’s the Impreza treating you?”

Michael took a couple casual steps closer to the register, looking around the office with wide eyes. “It’s doing just great,” he said. “And my old car?”

“Still runs like a champ,” Dean told him, grinning.

“Glad to hear it,” said Michael. He went right up the counter and, after pulling his hands from his pockets, lightly leaned forward onto his fists. “So how’s my brother?”

“Fine. Just fine.” Dean looked down and smiled. Thinking about Cas made him happy, even if the boy wasn’t feeling well.

“Good,” Michael said, acting somewhere between serious and sarcastic. He winced a little then stared Dean straight in the eyes. “Tell him he needs to come home.”

“Hey, hey,” said Dean, holding his palms out. “The guy’s eighteen. If he doesn’t wanna come home, he doesn’t have to.”

“But my parents are _supporting_ him, and doing a damn good job if you ask me. So he basically owes it to them to come back. And it’s fucking rude to walk out like that.”

“Hey!” Dean shouted. He scowled. “I don’t need you coming in here and talking like that, okay?”

Michael rolled his eyes. “What? Mechanics don’t cuss? I recall you laying down some heavy lines the last time I saw you.”

“You know what I mean,” Dean said, pointing a stern finger towards the other man. “No offense, but your folks have treated Cas like a dog. Hell, worse than a dog. In fact I’m pretty sure they’d treat any sorta animal better.”

“Seriously?” Michael scoffed. “You’re trying to throw my argument back at me?”

“No,” said Dean. “I’m trying to get it through your head that Cas is happy with me.”

“What, some pervert?” Dean glared. “Well? It’s a sexual relationship, isn’t it?”

“Not sure why that matters but _yes_ , we’re intimate. There’s way more to it than that, though.”

Michael looked like he was going to vomit at Dean’s “yes”, which made him wonder why he even asked. Dean folded his arms and pressed his lips together. “So that’s it?” he asked.

“Is what what?” Michael asked.

“You came all the way down here to tell Cas he’s still a kid?”

Michael shook his head. “No way,” he insisted with a dry chuckle. “I came all the way down here to TELL YOU TO STOP MOLESTING MY FUCKING BROTHER!!”

His voice was shrill in the office that Bobby definitely heard him over Mr. Twitty. He pounded his fists on the table and practically snarled at Dean, who didn’t seem the slightest bit impressed. In fact, he looked annoyed. “Funny how you suddenly care about him now.”

“I’ve always cared about him!” Michael yelled.

“Oh yeah, bullshit! While you’ve been away at school or whatever the fuck, he’s getting pushed around and beaten like a piñata by your damn parents!”

Michael suddenly reached over the counter and grabbed Dean’s uniform by the collar, but Dean immediately pushed him off, sending him back a bit. “Get your hands off me!” the older man hissed. “You’re lucky I don’t call the cops on your sorry ass!”

“Fuck you, man!” Michael shouted. He began to walk out of the office backwards. “Cas better get home or I’m going to bring him back myself!”

“Yeah well good luck,” Dean said. The intensity of his voice vanished, diffusing the argument completely. “Try anything like that and I _will_ call the cops.”

The doorbell chimed and Michael was gone, but Bobby came in through the side door almost on cue. “What’n the heck was that all about?” he asked, wiping his hands on a towel.

“Just some punk,” Dean said. “Were you watching?”

Bobby raised his eyebrows from the brim of his old baseball cap. “Maybe,” he said with a bit of old man sass. “That lover a yers brother, huh?”

Dean nodded. “Yeah,” he said with a sigh. “Mind if I knock off early?”

“Fine by me. Got nothin’ left today anyway. Thought I might work on the Mustang’s alternator. Everythin’ alright?”

“Guess so,” Dean said. “I just wanna get home to the little guy.”

* * *

The time it took to drive home felt like forever to Dean, but he finally made it and rushed inside. As he walked through the kitchen, he smiled to himself when he saw that Cas had eaten.

“Cas?” he called out. No answer so he went upstairs. “Hey.”

“Hello, Dean,” Cas muttered behind the covers. He looked like shit and stared at the TV.

“Feeling better?”

“Yes.”

“Good! Did you have enough to eat?”

“I’m fine.”

“Mmm okay. So uh, I saw your brother today.”

“What?!” Cas gasped. His heart suddenly began to pound. “Where? What did he say?!”

“Relax, it’s fine,” Dean said calmly. “He came to the shop and said you need to come home.”

“What? What did you tell him?”

“Told him you’re a big boy and you can make your own decisions.”

Cas appeared to be shaking slightly. He stared at Dean in complete horror. “Th-thank you.”

“Yeah, ‘course. He was a little hot headed but it’s okay. You’ll make that decision on your own, right?”

“Right.”

Dean stripped off all of his clothes and put them into his hamper. “Wanna shower with me?” Cas shook his head. “C’mon, you’ve been in bed all day. You’ll feel better if you get clean.”

“I’ll be fine,” Cas insisted weakly.

“Well, I’m gonna hop in the shower real quick but if you wanna take a bath afterwards then we can do that.”

Cas looked at Dean uneasily and said nothing. It wasn’t fair to him to keep that bruise a secret. But Dean didn’t know any better, so he gave a small smile then disappeared into the bathroom momentarily. Cas remained in bed while he got washed up, then Dean stepped out with a towel around his waist. “C’mon,” he said, motioning to the bathroom. “I’ll run you a bath. You gotta get out of bed.”

“I don’t especially want to.”

“Babe, this is silly. You’ll feel better if you get clean.” Cas shook his head. “If I fill the tub will you get in?”

“I suppose so. Wouldn’t want to waste the water.”

“Yeah, there we go. There’s my angel.”

Dean grinned ear to ear then went back inside. He plugged the tub and began to fill it with water, meanwhile Cas slid out from the covers and got into that big robe once more. He came into the bathroom and shyly stood in front of the door once he closed it.

“Almost,” said Dean. He looked back at Cas and winked. “Want me to join you?”

“No!” Cas protested loudly. The smile on Dean’s face immediately diminished.

“What? Why not?” he asked, looking sad. “What’s wrong?”

Cas pressed his eyes shut and kicked at the tiles. “Nothing. I’m sor—it’s nothing. I shouldn’t have yelled. I would just prefer to bathe alone.”

Dean sighed. “Okay, that’s fine.” He shut off the taps and stood up straight. “Go ahead in. I’ll make dinner. How’s that sound?”

“Um, fine,” Cas hummed. He walked by Dean and to the tub, where he kept the robe closed securely as he stared down into it. Dean leaned against the wall and folded his arms.

“Wouldn’t mind seeing you get in, though,” he smirked. Cas looked over his shoulder in shock. “What?”

“I just, um, well, I just want to do it alone. I’ve been in bed all day, like you said, and I look bad. You shouldn’t see me like this.”

“You look _cute_ ,” Dean insisted. “And you don’t have to do anything you don’t want to. It’s just that I’d really like to see you get naked and slide into that water.”

Cas didn’t answer and just kept his back to Dean, still looking at the steaming bath. “Here,” Dean said softly. He stepped up behind Cas and put his hands on the collar of the robe, then slowly rubbed at them as the cloth rolled off. Cas resisted only slightly since feeling Dean’s hands on him was a relief to the senses. He let him drop the robe to the floor, then smooth his big palms down his back. Dean leaned in to the nape of his neck and kissed him softly. “You need to eat more, baby,” he whispered. “You’re too thin.”

“I don’t feel like eating,” Cas said.

“You gotta try. Just a little.” Between more kisses he continued. “Will you eat dinner?”

“Yes.”

“Sure?”

“Mm.”

One long, wet kiss on Cas’ neck and Dean let off. “If you mean that,” he said. “I’ll get started. Go ahead and soak for as long as you want.”

He moved away from Cas but we he noticed his wasn’t getting in, he stood there and stared. “Babe?”

“Huh?”

“Go ahead.”

“I will,” said Cas. He stood his ground firmly.

“Baby what’s wrong? Something’s weird. Sure you’re feeling okay?”

Dean gently took his shoulder and turned the young man to face him. Oh, he could have resisted, but by now the jig was up. Cas looked right at Dean, but Dean’s eyes fell to his side. “What’s that?” he asked softly. Cas suddenly looked scared. “Babe, what happened? Did you fall?”

“N-no,” Cas said, shaking his head. He touched over the bruise and Dean’s eyes widened.

“Someone do this to you?!” Cas nodded. He appeared to be scared of Dean. “Did your dad hit you?!”

“No!” Cas squealed. He back away from Dean slightly.

“Did your brother?!”

As if Dean would finish where Michael left off, Cas hugged himself in fear and nodded very, very slowly. Dean’s eyes flashed white hot with rage.

“THE FUCK?!” he yelled. “THAT MOTHER FUCKER HAS THE NERVE TO SAY---AND THEN HE—HOW DARE HE LAY A HAND ON YOU!!!”

“Stop, stop!” Cas squealed. He began to cry and shake. “S-stop yelling!”

Dean calmed down and suddenly became sympathetic. “Oh, God, Cas. I didn’t mean to scare you. I’m sorry.” He went to hug him but Cas resisted at first. “Baby I’ll never hurt you.”

Cas cried harder and fell into his arms. He clung to Dean’s back and wailed.

“Shh, shh, it’s okay,” he cooed, patting the young man. “I didn’t mean to yell like that. Just…I just don’t like it when people hurt ones I care about.”

“I understand,” Cas said, trying to dry his tears.

“Sweetheart, why did Michael hit you?”

“B-because I’m sleeping with you.”

Dean tried to steady his breathing and not get irate. “Dick,” he said, rubbing Cas’ back. “You know he’s wrong, right?”

“I suppose.”

“Were you feeling sick at all, Cas?” The young man shook his head. Dean kissed through his hair. “You were hiding this from me?”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine, don’t worry about it. But next someone hurts you, you tell me, alright?”

Cas peered up at Dean with his bloodshot eyes and nodded. “I will,” he whispered. Dean leaned down and gave him a kiss on the lips.

“Now you soak nice and long while I make dinner.”


	16. Marmalade

After a long bath to settle his nerves, Cas slipped into a t-shirt and panties then came downstairs into the kitchen. Dinner was almost done and the table in there was already set. The room smelled generically of cooking but Cas couldn’t quite place what it was.

“Have a nice bath?” Dean asked.

“Yes,” Cas answered, taking a seat at the table. Dean was scurrying about between the fridge and stove. “What are you making?”

“Just eggs and rice.”

Cas realized that the covered Pyrex on the table had a bunch of steamed rice within. “I thought you could only cook pasta?” he asked.

“Hey, anybody can cook eggs. How do you want ‘em?”

“Scrambled if that’s alright.”

“Yeah, no problem.”

Feeling some new found comfort with the kitchen, Cas decided to get up and pour himself a glass of juice. Dean cracked eggs into a bowl, mixed them well and let them sizzle on the pan. He looked to Cas and smiled lovingly. “How’s the bruise?”

“It will hurt for a while I think, but it feels better.”

“Good.”

Cas held his glass in one hand and stepped over to Dean, resting his head against the man’s bicep as it stirred the eggs. Dean didn’t say anything but his head leaned to Cas and he kept smiling.

“That’ll do it,” he said finally once the eggs were ready. “I’m gonna take this to the table to watch out.”

“Okay,” Cas hummed. He quickly dashed over to his seat and plopped down as Dean hurried there to dole out the eggs.

“Tell me when,” he said. After just one scoop of egg did Cas tell him to stop. “That’s all?”

“I’m not very hungry.”

“Mmm okay,” Dean said with a frown. He put the rest of the eggs onto his plate then left the pan in the sink. “Need anything else?”

“Just some rice. But not much.”

“Yeah okay,” the older man agreed. He returned to the table, took the lid off of the rice bowl and went to scoop some out with a spoon.

“Um,” Cas interrupted shyly.

“Yeah?” Dean asked, dropping a big ball onto his plate.

“Dean, I…”

“What’s wrong?”

Cas shook his head. “It’s fine.”

“Rice okay?”

“Yes, of course. Thank you. I appreciate it.”

Looking at him worriedly, Dean pressed his lips together and took a seat. He served himself some rice then dropped a fat pat of butter onto it. “Got everything?” he asked Cas, who was just sitting there with his hands in his lap, staring at his plate.

“Yes.”

“Cool.” Dean began to eat but Cas remained motionless; his sad eyes gazing at the food as questions sorted through his head. “It’s gonna get cold.”

“Oh,” Cas said. “Right.” He picked up a fork and took a little bit of egg onto the tines. He only had a few bites then left the rest.

“Is that all?”

“Yes. As I said, I’m not very hungry.”

“Now I don’t wanna sound like a parent but baby, you gotta eat more. A guy like you needs calories. I can see your ribs.”

Cas looked down at himself and frowned. Then he watched Dean shoveling food into his mouth.

“You aren’t trying to be that thin, are you?” Dean asked. Cas shook his head quickly. “Okay, ‘cause it worries me. I don’t want you to be thinking you’re fat or something then taking an extreme diet.”

“No, I don’t mind how I look,” Cas said. “I’m just not hungry.”

Dean set his fork down on the empty plate then took his chin into his hand. He looked at Cas sadly. “I don’t wanna pressure you, but the amount you eat _is_ unhealthy. When I was eighteen I couldn’t _stop_ eating. And I didn’t gain weight or anything, it was just my metabolism.”

“But my body is a lot different than yours.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” Dean considered. “But Sam and Adam were the same.”

“Perhaps that’s how your family genetics are?”

“Okay, I get that. But how much did you eat today? Anything other than this right now?”

“Some toast.”

Dean sighed. “Cas, that’s like maybe 400 calories max. Your body needs more than that just for basic functions.”

“But I’m not hungry.” Cas rubbed his arms now. “I can make my own decisions.”

For a moment Dean was upset. He didn’t want Cas to decide he would starve himself. But he had a point. “Yeah,” Dean said, wetting his lips with a thin strip of tongue. He got up from the table and picked up his plate. “You eat when you want to. So are you done?”

Cas looked at his plate again. He stared for a second, saying nothing, then took two quick bites and presented the plate to Dean, who took it with a smile and headed towards the sink. Cas sat there silently as Dean washed up. When he was done, he snatched that mason jar of preserves off of the counter and returned to the table with it and a spoon.

“But you gotta try this,” he said, grinning.

“What is it?” Cas asked, leering at the jar with great curiosity.

“Nectarine marmalade. A customer gave it to me. They made it.”

He twisted off the lid and stuck the spoon into it. A big, glistening glob of amber came out and he ate it with a spoon.

“Ooh, ooh you gotta try it. You like fruit, right?”

“Yes.”

“Here.”

Dean put another spoonful into the jar and heaved it out, then leaned over the table and held it out to Cas. “It’s awesome.”

Blushing, Cas closed his eyes and took the spoon into his mouth. He closed his lips around it and smiled. “Oh gosh,” he said. “It is.”

“Mmm, tasty?” Cas nodded as Dean brought the spoon back to the jar and lifted another glob out. “More?”

“Yes please.”

This time, Dean stood up and came around to Cas’ side, bringing the marmalade with him. He held the spoon to Cas’ mouth and it disappeared right away.

“See? You like eating now.”

Cas licked his lips and gazed up at Dean. “I’ve always _liked_ eating, I just don’t always feel the need to do it.”

“Mmm, okay. You want more?”

“Perhaps just one.”

“Heheh, here ya go.”

Another spoonful went into Cas’ mouth, but as it slipped out they were interrupted by a **BANG BANG BANG** from the living room.

“What was that?” Cas gasped, eyes wide as he made himself swallow.

“Door. Hold on.”

Dean got up quickly, tossing the spoon to the table and rushed out of the kitchen. Cas sat there and looked at his hands. “Who is it?” he called out.

“I dunno,” Dean said from the other room. “Stay in there.”

It sounded like he went upstairs. The room above the kitchen, which Cas had not been in, creaked with steps then Dean rushed down again.

**BANG BANG BANG**

“Dean, who is it?”

“Just hold on, stay there,” Dean said quickly as he went to the door. He opened it up and Michael burst through, walking inside as if he owned the place. “Woah, trespassing much?” Dean huffed. Michael ignored him and went straight to the kitchen, peering around.

“Castiel!” Michael hissed. Cas jumped in the chair.

“Michael?! Why are you here?!”

Michael’s condescending eyes fell down on Cas and his lip twitched. “What are you wearing?”

“Clothes,” said Cas. He remained in his chair but leaned to one side and yelled, “Dean?!”

“Time to come home,” Michael said, stepping closer to Cas. But Dean popped out of the doorway, came right up behind Michael and held a handgun to the back of his head. Michael froze and stared forward. Cas watched them in horror. “Dean, no!” he squealed.

“That’s illegal,” said Michael.

“Nope,” Dean insisted. “You’re trespassing. My gun is licensed. I can use it to protect the people I care about. You’re lucky I’m not a coward and go running to the cops.”

“I’m doing what I have to do,” Michael groaned.

“And what’s that?”

“Bring Castiel home.”

“Does he want to go home?” Dean asked.

“It’s not a matter of want, it’s that he has to.”

Cas had to interrupt here. He shook his head, hugging his arms and said, “I don’t want to go home.”

“Yeah and he doesn’t have to,” said Dean, keeping the gun’s cold tip pressed against Michael’s head. “So leave.”

“No, no, he _has_ to,” Michael insisted. “And can you get that weapon away from me so we can discuss this like adults?”

“Like adults?” Dean asked. He smacked his lips. “I think the adult way to discuss this is to let Cas, the adult, make his own decisions. Or I can call the cops and have you arrested.”

Michael winced. He bit his bottom lip and frowned at Cas. “Why can’t you just come back?”

“Because I don’t want to,” said Cas. “I like to be here. Dean is nice to me.”

“Yeah but dad said—“

“That’s it,” Dean interrupted. He brought the gun down but kept it firmly in his hand. “You’re here to do your father’s bidding, aren’t you?”

“Yes of course,” said Michael. He slumped his shoulders.

“Hey, listen, I get it; you wanna be the good kid that listens to his folks and makes ‘em happy, right?” Michael nodded. “Okay, but maybe you were too busy getting into school and having a nice life ‘cause your parents treated you well to notice that Cas got the shitty end of the stick. It looks to me that he’s never been happy. He’s been denied basic pleasures of life, like ice cream and sugar and basically anything good. He’s mentally wounded from that, and if your father is too much of a pussy to actually parent and sends you to do it himself, then it’s time you did things you wanted to do. Do _you_ want to come here and beat Cas up?”

“Not really, since you’ve asked,” Michael said softly.

“See? You’ve all been bullied by him. I bet he’s hit you, too.”

“He used to,” Michael sighed. “But if I took care of my brothers he wouldn’t.”

“So you beat Cas instead?” Michael didn’t answer. “Yeah I thought so. I know. You think he’ll keep secrets from me for very long? No. And I’ll tell you why, too; he doesn’t like his family. Sure, he’s conditioned himself to care about them, but they’ve been horrible to him, all of them, and now that he’s gained some distance he can see it, right?” Dean looked at Cas and the young man nodded with a tiny smile. “If he wants to leave home, let him. If he wants to experiment and try having new foods and fuck an older man, let him. Maybe one day he’ll decide it’s not for him and try someone younger or a woman, who knows.” Cas made a sick face at this remark but he knew what Dean was trying to convey. “But tell your dad to go fuck himself. You’re an adult too, Michael.”

Michael said nothing. He stared at the ground then looked at Cas and frowned. “Why do you like this guy so much?”

“He cares about me,” said Cas. “I never realized anybody could treat me this well.”

Dean took a deep breath and let it run out of his nose slowly. “Unlike your family,” he began, his voice sounding a bit quivery. “I love him.”

Cas’ eyes lit up and wobbled, while Michael turned to face Dean but Dean avoided looking at anybody. “Now get out before I actually call the cops, ‘cause that would be the right thing to do at this point.”

Michael said nothing and dragged his tail between his legs as he left. The front door closed gently and Dean put his gun on the table. “Didn’t mean to scare you,” he said. “It wasn’t even loaded.”

Cas kept his wide eyes staring at Dean, lips gently parted. “Do you mean that?” he asked in a voice that was little more than a whisper.

“Yeah, ‘course. I wouldn’t lie like that. Especially not in front of you.”

Cas stood up and hugged Dean. He hugged him and hugged him, squeezing tight with a big smile. “So you’re not too young to understand?”

Dean turned Cas’ face to kiss him and kiss him he did. “No,” he said, smiling. His hand cupped Cas’ face and he let that thumb rub over the soft lips. “I know what it’s all about and I know how you feel. I think you know, too. I love you.”

“I love you,” Cas whispered, closing his eyes. They kissed once more and Cas finally felt comfortable. Completely comfortable.


	17. Straw hats, honey and promises

 

“How’s this?”

“Mmn…good…”

They had retired to the bedroom now; the lights were off and only several candles glowed on the night stand. Cas was on his stomach, completely naked and groaning softly as Dean, also naked, rubbed him down with warming, chocolate scented massage oil. His thumbs rubbed along the sides of Cas’ prominent spine.

“Yeah? Feel good?”

“Very good.”

“Nice.”

Dean leaned down and pressed his pursed lips to Cas’ shoulder. It was sticky and sweet with the oil. Cas wiggled as Dean’s palms rubbed over his slick flesh.

“How’s that bruise feel?” Dean asked.

“It’s much better.”

“I’m glad,” Dean whispered. He moved his lips over to Cas’ ear and kissed at the lobe. His voice growled “Want you to be happy.”

“Aah…”

Teeth gently nibbled Cas’ ear. “You wanna fool around?”

“No,” Cas peeped into the pillow. His head shook gently. “I’m not feeling up for it. Maybe tomorrow? Is that alright?”

“Yeah, ‘course. It’s all up to you, babydoll. Still want more massaging?”

“Please.”

Dean smiled as he sat up again, putting more pressure onto Cas’ back. He watched his hands in the dark shadows on candlelight, gliding up to the top of his shoulders then turning outwards slightly and pushing his thumbs into the flesh as he smoothed down to the thin waist. Cas wriggled a bit and Dean continued to rub him over and over in the same fashion.

“You look sexy,” Dean growled.

“Thank you…”

“So sexy.”

Cas stretched beneath Dean’s massaging hands and made a tiny groan. He turned his head to look at his partner and suppressed a yawn. “I’m tired,” he said.

“Alright, let’s get some sleep, then.”

Dean used a towel that was on the nightstand to rub off some of the massage oil, then he pulled the covers over themselves and hugged Cas against him. The candles were all snuffed before he got back to bed, leaving the room quite dark. Dean kissed the top of Cas’ head several times and whispered “You ever been to a farmer’s market?”

“Hmm…” Cas had to take a moment to consider the question. He propped his chin upon Dean’s chest and stared at him. “It seems to be that I went to one when I was very, very young. Why?”

“There’s one in town tomorrow. The folks that made that marmalade are selling it there. I kinda wanna go and check it out, thought it might be fun for you, too.”

“Oh!” Cas giggled. “It sounds fun. I’d like that.”

“Okay, weeeell,” Dean rolled his eyes up to the ceiling and smiled cutely. “How ‘bout I drive you to school tomorrow, then I’ll knock off from work early and pick you up. We can go there right away after school.”

“That’s a good idea. We can do that.”

Cas laid his head on Dean’s chest again and closed his eyes. His mouth remained in a content smile. A few silent moments passed by, then Cas muttered, “do you really love me?”

“I do.”

That was enough for Cas to reach a mini-nirvana. He let out a long, satisfied sigh and hugged Dean tighter. Someone loved him. Someone really loved him.

* * *

The morning arrived quickly. When the alarm on Cas’ phone went off, both of the men jumped in surprise. “Aah!” Cas whimpered. “I was so far away!”

“Unnh…ssuh…Cas…” Dean rubbed his eyes, gasping softly. “Alarm…huhh…”

Cas groped around for his phone on the nightstand. It continued to buzz and buzz until he turned it off. “Sorry,” Cas said. Dean sat up and yawned real big.

“All good,” he groaned, stretching. “Gotta get that pretty little ass of yours to school.”

“Yes,” said Cas. He seemed a little dismayed as he slid out of bed and headed towards the bathroom. Dean soon joined him for a quick shower, then they finished getting dressed and went downstairs.

“How ‘bout we grab breakfast out? Something fast like donuts.”

“That sounds nice.”

Cas smiled at Dean while he got his shoes on, then slung his school bag over his shoulder and went out to the car. They drove through a little donut place and got a couple, juice for Cas and a cup of coffee for Dean. “I don’t have cup holders,” Dean said with a frown.

By the time they got to Cas’ school, breakfast was done and gone. Only ten minutes til the warning bell so Cas had to be on his way. He leaned over the leather seat and gave Dean a long, wet, goodbye kiss. Dean held the side of Cas’ face as he sucked his mouth, then they separated with sharp gasps.

“When’s school over? 2:10?”

“Yes.”

“Alright, I’ll be back. Have a good one.”

Cas smiled and gazed at Dean with big eyes. His mouth wanted to say “I love you” again, but part of him thought if he said it too much it would lose it value. Instead, he waved and blew a kiss as he headed inside.

Both days were grueling. It felt like every second was a minute and every minute was an hour. All of Cas’ classes were boring and painfully long as he waited and waited until school was over. Dean consumed all of his thoughts, and it was pretty much the same for Dean; every moment he wasn’t holding Cas was a moment wasted.

But bliss was in sight and finally the day was over. Cas stepped out of his school with a big smile, inhaled a deep breath and looked around for Dean. He saw the big old car idling in line with a bunch of minivans. Cas waved like a dork and went running to him. It had only been a few hours but it felt more like years.

“Hey babe,” Dean said, giving Cas a quick kiss. “I missed you.”

“I missed you, too,” Cas sighed. He clicked the belt around his waist and grinned. Then he noticed a bag on the floor. “What’s that?”

“Well,” Dean began with a chuckle. He drove out of the parking lot and headed towards town. “I actually knocked out of work even earlier, so I went and did a little shopping.”

“Without me? What is it?”

“A surprise. You’ll see later.”

Cas’ eyes lit up. A surprise? What on Earth could it be? Now he wanted to be home to open it, but the excitement of wondering was nice, too.

Soon they pulled into a big parking lot that was attached to a huge multipurpose space. Numerous tents were set up and the whole area was filled with people.

“Here we are,” Dean said. “Let’s go take a look.”

They got out of the car and Cas went around to Dean’s side, taking his hand and using his free one to shield his eyes. “It’s so bright,” he said.

“Wanna wear my sunglasses?” Dean asked. He pulled a pair from the pocket in his shirt and handed them to Cas, but the young man politely declined. Shrugging, Dean put his glasses on and headed towards the market.

They decided it would be best if they started on one side and meandered down to the end, then came back the other side. That way they weren’t crisscrossing the people traffic too much and they were sure to check every booth. It was important to Cas because he was really quite impressed with it all. Any sort of homemade item was available, and then some. They passed tents of wicker baskets, candles, quilts and many other goods but Cas was impressed the most by the hats.

“Hats?” Dean asked.

“Yes. Do you think one would suit me?”

“Guess it depends on which.”

Cas took a round straw hat from a hook and put it on his head. There was a pink ribbon around it and a plastic flower glued on one side. He smiled at Dean and cocked his head. “How is this?”

“Very cute,” Dean said with a smile.

“It’s a bit girly, I know, but I like it.”

“Yeah, me, too. I’ll get it for you.”

“Will you?”

“Sure.” Dean kissed Cas on the nose then handed the woman behind the counter some money for it. She smiled nervously and handed him his change. Cas pulled the brim down a little more.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome,” Dean said, coming back to give his partner another quickly kiss. They held hands and continued to walk through the market.

The other side of the stalls was all of the produce. Bright red tomatoes, shiny apples, crisp snap peas. Everything looked so beautiful.

“Hmm,” Dean hummed, staring at a couple wooden pails full of potatoes.

“What is it?”

“I was thinkin’. Do you wanna cook something tonight?”

“I suppose so. Did you have a dish in mind?”

“Yeah, actually. There’s this chicken soup my mom used to make. I think I got the recipe laying around somewhere.”

“Oh?” Cas asked, staring at Dean seriously. “That sounds…fun…possibly.”

“It could be, yeah.” Dean picked up a couple potatoes and looked them over. “Do you see celery anywhere?”

They went through the table and got a couple other veggies, bagged and bought them then went on their way. Dean asked if he wanted anything else and Cas nearly said no, but then he saw a stall that was selling local honey.

“Honey?” he asked curiously.

“We make it on our farm right in town,” said the man behind the table. He pointed to a couple jars in front. “Care for a sample?”

“That would be nice, thank you,” Cas said in a very shy little voice. “Dean?”

“Sure, I’ll try some.”

The man took two tiny plastic spoons and dipped them into a jar. Golden honey oozed in them as he handed them over. “This is wildflower.”

Cas held the spoon in his fingers gingerly and pulled it inside his mouth. He smiled and closed his eyes. “Mmm,” resonated in his throat. “It’s lovely.”

Dean ate his quickly and sucked his teeth. “Not bad,” he said. Honey didn’t seem to be something he was too crazy about. “Want some?”

“Please?”

“Heheh, alright. I’ll take a jar of that wildflower stuff.”

“Thanks much,” the man said. He exchanged money for goods with Dean and _then_ they were on their way. Cas sat in the car with all of their purchases in his lap, hat on the seat beside him and a big smile on his face.

“Was that fun?” Dean asked.

“Yes, a lot.”

Dean quickly looked over at Cas as he began to drive. The late day sun was glittering off of his skin. “Looks like you got a little tan.”

“I did? Is that bad?”

“It’s cute.”

They had to stop off at the regular grocery store as well, since Dean didn’t have any chicken at home. He remembered that the recipe was for a crockpot while they were there, and that would take all day, so they picked up a frozen pizza for dinner that night.

Once they finally got home, all of their purchases came in, including the mystery bag Dean had in the car earlier. He handed it to Cas. “Wanna open it now?” he asked with a smirk.

“I would love to,” said Cas. He set the bag down on the table while Dean turned on the oven.

“Go ahead.”

Cas reached inside, through some white tissue paper and pulled out an outfit. It was mostly blue and white, and at first Cas didn’t realize what it was. He had to open the pieces up completely to realize.

“A cheerleader costume?” he asked, tilting his head. There was a little blue skirt with white pleats, then a tank top.

“Thought it might look good on you. What do you think?”

“It’s very cute. I like it.” Cas looked to Dean and smiled. “Thank you, this is sweet. I’ll try it on.”

“How about after dinner? I don’t wanna get distracted. Heheh.”

Cas nodded and he put the outfit back into its bag. Not too long afterward, the pizza was ready and they sat down for a quick dinner. Dean threw back a couple beers and Cas finished his food with a nice big spoonful of honey. It made him _very_ happy.

“Alright sweetheart, how ‘bout we go check out the cheerleader thing officially?”

“Yes,” Cas agreed. He stood up and took the bag in his hands. “This will be fun. Different, but fun.”

Dean put the dishes in the sink and wrapped up the leftover pizza while Cas headed up stairs. He wanted to give him time to get dressed first, but once the kitchen was in decent shape for the night, Dean closed up and followed. Cas was in the bedroom, sitting on the bed with his legs together. He had the little outfit on and a cute smirk across his face.

“Mmm,” Dean growled upon seeing him. He walked up to the bed and stood in front of Cas. “You look sexy as shit.”

“I do?” asked Cas. A look in his eye told Dean that he was possibly teasing and just playing innocent.

“You wearing anything underneath that skirt?” Dean inquired, reaching out to touch him.

“No.”

“Niiiice,” Dean hummed. “So you wanna fool around now?” Cas nodded and Dean wet his lips. He sat on the bed properly and motioned for Cas to come. “How ‘bout you sit on my face?” He asked, pulling off his clothes quickly. Cas blushed.

“A-alright.”

Shyly, Cas gripped the headboard and slid up to Dean’s face. He spread his legs and let the skirt fall around Dean’s head and his asshole was immediately met with a wet tongue.

“Oooh!” Cas howled. He tightened his hole and closed his eyes. Dean’s tongue battered against it with great fervor, running circles around the ring of muscle then kissing the area with his lips. Cas’ face grew hot with desire and he clutched the headboard more, arching his back to stick his ass out as he began to grind against Dean’s face.

“Fuck my tongue,” Dean moaned between licks. He firmed up his tongue and prodded it inside Cas, which made the younger man respond with a great squeal. Dean reached down to his own cock and began to jerk off quickly. Cas worked his ass hard, really riding Dean’s face while he gasped and groaned.

“Oh, oh, Dean! Ahh! Haa!”

Dean continued to lick and suck around the hole as his tongue reached within. His face was smothered by Cas’ body and he loved it. Precum dribbled from the cock he rubbed ferociously. He pulled his tongue out just long enough to say, “want you to cum from my tongue.”

“Mmhh…y-yes…” Cas groaned, sitting down on the tongue again. He felt his hands beneath his skirt and began to fumbled his package. His cocked flopped up and down as he rode Dean’s face but was still very hard. He rubbed the sticky tip, flushed with heat in his face and his cock. “Ohh! Ohh gosh!”

Smiling around his tongue, Dean wiggled and flicked the muscle within Cas’ hole. He burrowed his face right into him, tongue fucking him harder and harder. Both of the men groaned and gasped, breathed heavily and whimpered as their bodies quivered in unison.

“I-I’m going to cum!” Cas yelped. His asshole tightened around the wet, throbbing tongue and he squeezed at his dick. The sensation of Cas’ entire body shaking and writhing as his cum burst forth and got on the skirt sent Dean into his own orgasm. Thick ribbons of his ejaculate shot onto his abs, firm from his muscles locking up. “Aaah!!”

“Mmmm—fuck!” Dean groaned against the booty on his face. His rubbed his cock as his orgasm calmed down, trying to catch his breath. “Ohh baby, is that gonna be good enough for you?”

“Yes,” Cas agreed, shaking slightly. He slowly got off of Dean’s face and plopped down onto the bed, back to the headboard. “Dean, that was wonderful.”

Dean let off his crotch and folded his arms behind his head. Mouth open, he turned to look at Cas and grinned. “Best tasting ass ever. Swear to God.” He pursed his lips. “Taste yourself on me.

Cas smiled and leaned in to give Dean a kiss. He ran his tongue over Dean’s lip and withdrew. “It does taste good, actually.”

“See? You got one heck of a delicious booty. And I think it tastes even better in that sexy outfit.”

“It’s very comfortable. I like it.”

Sighing happily, Cas cuddled up against Dean and closed his eyes.

“Aren’t you gonna get out of it?” Dean asked, chuckling. “Might not be the best thing to sleep in.”

“Oh, that’s true,” Cas remarked. He sat up to pull the top off, the slipped out of the skirt. They were put on the nightstand to be washed, then they climbed beneath the covers and cuddled up together again. “Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“Do you still love me?”

Dean smiled sweetly and pet Cas’ head. “Baby I will always love you. That doesn’t change in a few hours.”

“I’m just making sure.”

They kissed.

“I promise to love you forever.”

Cas smiled and closed his eyes, pressing into Dean’s lips again. His skinny arms wrapped around Dean’s shoulders and they hugged tighter. “Me, too,” he whispered.

“Cas?”

“Yes?”

“Will you move in?”

“What do you mean?”

“Will you make this place your home. Our home. Together. No going back to your folks’ place.”

Cas held his breath for a moment. He touched his nose to Dean’s and thought. A slow breath made its way out of him and he kissed him once more, just softly with their lips closed.

“Yes.”


	18. God Gives You Two Chances

 

For some odd reason, Cas was awake unusually early. It wasn’t even five o’clock yet and he couldn’t get back to sleep. Dean lay on his side, ripped back to Cas that rose and fell with his heavy, deep sleep. As the younger of them tried and tried to snooze again, all he could do was close his eyes and listen to Dean snoring softly. A couple grunts popped out here and there as well.

It was when the clock finally made it to five that Cas decided to get out of bed. It wasn’t doing any good to keep sitting there and potentially wake up Dean. He went into the shower and got dressed, then he slithered downstairs. Walking through the kitchen he realized that he was extremely hungry.

“Food…”

The honey was there still, sitting on the counter and gleaming in all of its glory. He couldn’t just eat honey out of the jar for breakfast, right? That would be too intense and somewhat disgusting or piggish, at least. Still, it was tempting. Too tempting, in fact. He took one big spoonful and put it into his mouth.

“Aah…”

Delight overwhelmed him and he hugged himself. How did that honey manage to be superior to the little bear-shaped bottle that Dean already had? Okay, another spoonful, but only because it was _so_ good and he felt _so_ hungry.

“Mmmm…”

But that was enough. Too much pure sugar so early in the morning was bound to give Cas a tummy ache. He needed something else to wash it down with. In the fridge, he took out a carton of milk and poured himself a glass. He guzzled it quickly and poured himself enough. It was cold and rich and delightful. His mouth still tasted of honey and the milk blended very well. As he drank the second glass, some ran down his lips and he wiped it off with his arm.

“Babe?”

Suddenly Dean was in the threshold, rubbing his eyes with his hands. Cas startled and looked right at him. “I couldn’t sleep.”

“What’cha doin’?”

“Drinking some milk…and eating some honey.”

“Be careful with all that pure sugar so early in the morning. It’s bound to give you a tummy ache.”

“That’s why I had some milk.”

Dean walked behind Cas and put his arms around his waist. He pulled their naked bodies together with a sleepy groan. “Have some toast or something to level it out. Want me to make it for you?”

Cas shook his head. “I can do it. This is partly my house, after all.”

“That’s right,” Dean said with a smile, placing kisses on Cas’ soft neck. “It’s your kitchen, your food, your living room, your bathroom, your bedroom…”

Cas hummed happily as Dean spoke. He rocked back against the man and relaxed. But the need to eat was still there, so he soon stepped out of Dean’s embrace and went to the cabinet to get some bread. “Would you like anything?”

“Nah, not yet. Just coffee but I’ll do that.”

“Alright.”

While Dean prepped the coffee maker, Cas stuck some bread into the toaster and poured another glass of milk. He got the butter from the fridge while he was in there, too.

“Actually,” said Dean, watching Cas take his toast from the toaster. “Maybe throw some in there for me, too.”

“Of course,” Cas nodded. He then made some toast for Dean, too.

“So are you gonna go home and get your things?” Dean asked as they took all of their food to the table. Cas sat down and nibbled a piece of toast delicately.

“I don’t have a whole lot to get but yes, I’ll do that after school today.”

“Cool. I won’t come home early, then.”

“No don’t do that, you need to work.”

“Yeah.”

Dean took a big sip of coffee and sat back in his chair with the mug in his hands. He smiled and stared at the ceiling.

“What are you thinking about?” Cas asked. There was still another untouched piece of toast on his plate.

“You know my guest bedroom?”

“Um, not exactly.”

“Okay so I have a second bedroom and it’s just a sofa bed, in case one of my brothers stays over or something. But I thought I’d bring the sofa down here and turn that into a room for you.”

“A room for me?” Cas asked, blushing. He stared at Dean with amazement.

“Yeah, we can make it a study room or chill out lounge, astral hall or uh, sex dungeon. Whatever. Your pick. Maybe if you go to college a study room might be good.”

Cas nodded enthusiastically. “Yes,” he agreed, smiling. “Maybe it can be a little of everything.”

“Then we’ll go to a furniture store over the weekend and pick out some nice stuff for it. How’s that sound?”

“Incredible. Thank you.”

“No, no, Cas; thank _you_.”

Cas tilted his head. “Why?”

Dean’s voice melted into a low, sincere mumble. “’Cause you came into my life and gave me purpose.”

“How?”

“Before I met you, I was just some dude working his job and coming home to his empty place. There was nothing special. No drive. No meaning. Then you came along and now I have a reason to better myself.”

Cas reached over the table and squeezed his fingers for Dean’s touch. Dean put his coffee down and laced both of his hands with Cas’.

“I love you so much,” Dean whispered. Cas looked at him then closed his eyes in satisfaction. He held Dean’s hands long enough to feel his pulse running through him.

“Are we going to make that soup?” Cas asked.

“Oh!” Dean exclaimed, snapping out of his fantastical romantic moment. “Right. If we get it going now, it’ll be ready for dinner. You gonna help?”

“I guess.”

Dean sprang up from the table and went to the fridge. He took everything they had bought the day before out and set it on the counter, then he brought out the crockpot and with no time to waste started washing and slicing the vegetables.

“The recipe?” Cas asked, still sitting at the table. He took another small bite of cold toast.

“Right. Somewhere around here.”

Dean pulled a couple drawers open and pawed through them until he found a small, old book that had some notecards stuck in it. He paged through pies, cobblers, salads and roasts until he found soups. “There we go,” he announced, putting the little card onto the table. “It’s super easy.”

“Good,” said Cas.

While Dean prepped everything and set it into the crockpot, Cas just sat at the table and watched. It seemed like he would get in the way if he tried.

“Alright,” said Dean. He washed his hands then turned the machine on low. “That’ll do it. What d’ya think?”

“I’m excited to see how it turns out.”

“Me, too. Me, too.”

* * *

Cas absolutely did not want to go back to his house. It was obvious now that he didn’t belong there and nobody would treat him right if he stayed. He was sick of confrontations and sick of arguments. He hated being banned from wonderful things like ice cream and sugar, television and being in the sun. A chapter had begun in his life and he didn’t want any remnants of the previous ones to linger. Luckily, his parents still weren’t home from work when he rolled by after school.

The moment he came inside the house he heard something upstairs, so he held the bags he brought to fill up close to his chest and carefully ascended the stairs. In no time at all did Cas realize it was a video game coming from his brother’s room.

“Gabriel?”

“Woah!” Gabe shouted. He jumped in the beanbag chair on the ground and stared up at Cas. “Why’re you here?”

“I’m coming to get my things.”

“Wait, what? You’re leaving-leaving?”

“Yes,” Cas said with a nod.

“Why?”

“Because the person I’ve met is much nicer than the one here. Is Michael still around?”

“No, he left right away,” Gabe said with a frown. He looked at the controller in his hands disappointedly.

“What’s wrong?” asked Cas.

“My brothers keep leaving! I dunno why Mike left like that. He came home one day and just disappeared. He was sorta mad at dad, too. Why’s everyone mad and leaving?”

“Well,” Cas began solemnly. “It’s complicated. But, um, Gabriel…”

Cas’ brother looked at him with serious eyes. It was unusual to see Gabriel doing anything but crack jokes and grin.

“If anything is ever difficult or unfair at home, then you will call me, won’t you?”

“Uh, okay.”

“Promise me this.”

“Okay, I promise.”

“You may not understand now and you may not ever understand, but without Michael or around, things might change for you.”

“Change?”

“Yes. I hope not, but it is possible.”

“Oka-ay…”

“I’m going to pack my belongings now.”

Cas sighed as Gabe went right back to playing games, then he went off to his old room. He took the clothes that he wanted, a couple books, some writing implements but that was mostly all he owned. A few other knickknacks here and there, but it didn’t take very long and the bags weren’t even packed full. Before leaving, he went to Gabe’s room once more.

“I’m going to now,” he announced sadly.

“Oh, okay,” said Gabe. “When are you gonna be back?”

“I’d prefer not to ever return.”

“Waa? Not even to visit?”

“No,” said Cas, shaking his head. “There’s no reason. Our parents have been cruel to me. I have to leave. But I want to stay in touch with you, and we can always spend time together.”

Gabriel set his controller down and got off of the beanbag. He ran up to Cas and gave him a hug. At first they embraced in silence, then Gabe pushed his face into Cas’ chest and mumbled “I don’t want you to go.”

“I know, I’m sorry. But you’ll grow up one day and leave, too.”

“I don’t wanna grow up!”

“I’m not sure what to say about that.”

Gabe sniffed loudly. He squeezed his brother tighter and cried against him. Cas tried his best to comfort him. It was strange feeling like the sibling with authority. He had never felt like an older brother.

“Everything will be fine,” Cas reassured him. “I’m still in this area. We will see each other often. Maybe I can give you rides to school.”

“Okay,” Gabe muttered.

The hug ended and Cas stared down at his weepy brother. He felt terrible about it but he had no other choice. “I’ll do my best to take care of you when I can,” Cas promised. “I will.”

“Okay.”

“Goodbye.”

“Bye…”

Cas took his bags and went downstairs, looking over his shoulder at Gabriel who stood there, hair in his face with a big frown. He waved weakly as Cas disappeared out of the front door. Even though he was sad to leave his little brother, having the house and all of its bad memories behind him was the most liberating feeling he had ever known.

* * *

“There he is!”

Dean shouted when he came home from work. Cas had curled up on the sofa with the TV on. He had a blanket wrapped around himself and a big smile on his face. Dean dashed up to him and gave him a hug and a kiss. “Smells great in here too, huh?”

“Yes. I think the soup is ready.”

“Awesome. Wanna try some?”

Cas nodded and got off of the sofa. They headed into the kitchen together and were assaulted with the intoxicating aroma of slowly stewed chicken.

“It smells wonderful,” Cas remarked.

“Want a bowl?” Dean asked. Cas nodded as he took a seat at the table. Dean went into the cupboards and took down two bowls which he then used a ladle to fill. The soup was steamy and beautiful. “Oh, wow. It looks better than I remembered.”

Cas giggled. Dean set the bowls down on the table and handed his partner a spoon. “Thank you,” Cas said in a tiny voice. Dean put a kiss on his forehead then sat down.

“It’s fuckin’ hot,” he said.

“Then we can wait,” Cas said with a nod. He took a small spoonful and blew on it several times before putting it into his mouth. “Ahh, it’s wonderful!”

“Heheh, yeah?” Dean did the same as Cas and react similarly as well. “Oh! Amazing!”

For the first time, the two men shared an entire meal together with big smiles on their faces. Cas happily ate his entire bowl, smiling and humming with each spoonful. A soft shade of pink was on his cheeks and nose.

“Feels good to eat, doesn’t it?” Dean asked.

“It does,” Cas agreed. He got up and took their empty bowls to the sink. “Um, Dean?”

“Yeah?”

“Can I ask something special?”

“Well, sure. Of course you can.” Dean got up and stood behind Cas. He hugged him and put his lips on his shoulder.

“I want to have sex now,” Cas whispered.

“That’s great. We can do that.”

“But, um, I want something different.”

“Yeah? What’s that?” A big, excited grin grew on Dean’s face, but Cas didn’t appear nearly as happy. He turned around in Dean’s embrace and stared at him quite seriously.

“I um…”

“Yeah? What?”

“I want you to fuck me without a condom.”

“What!” Dean’s smiled dropped and he looked absolutely shocked. “Babe, why? Don’t ever fuck without a condom.”

“But we’re exclusive, aren’t we?”

“Well, yeah, but—“

“And you’ve been tested since we had sex the first time, haven’t you?”

“I was tested _after_ the first time we had sex.”

“And I’ve only had it with you.”

“Right, but, Cas,--“

“We’re both clean and safe. There’s no reason we can’t. Don’t you want us to be closer? I’ve had your dick in my mouth and you’ve had your mouth on my asshole. I think that’s nearly the same.”

“That’s true…but…ugh…Cas…I…well…”

Dean stared at Cas and took a deep breath. He made a good point.

“Do you doubt that I was a virgin?”

“No, no! it’s not that. Not at all. I trust you entirely. It’s just…”

“Dean?” Cas cocked his head and kept staring at his partner. Dean grew sheepish and looked down. His voice fell into a whisper.

“I’ve just never had sex without a condom.”

“Never?”

“Never. I’ve always been safe.”

“Then it will be new for both of us. Do you want that?”

Dean nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “I do.”

They exchanged shy smiles and went up to the bedroom right away. Cas undressed and got on the bed, laying on his back with his legs spread. As Dean pulled out of his clothes, Cas grew hard very quickly. Dean got on the bed and slipped Cas’ legs around his waist. “Alright,” he said, happy but also nervous. “if this is what you want.”

Cas nodded. He softly stroked himself, watching Dean get some lube on his fingers and bring them to his ass. He rubbed around the little ring of muscle and eased one finger inside.

“Mmmm,” Cas groaned. There was something more confident about him this time. He was more relaxed, more comfortable. A happy smile was on his face as his eyes closed and head tipped back into the pillow. Dean rubbed another finger inside and curled delicately. “Aah!”

“That’s good,” Dean cooed. “Real good. Fuck my fingers, baby.”

“Oooh,” Cas whined. He rocked his hips gently in time with the motions of Dean’s fingers. They scissored apart, stretching the tight hole. “Deaaan…fuck me…”

“Heheh, alright.”

Dean was actually shaking a little. He rubbed a lot of lubricant up and down his shaft, gripped the base and held its head to Cas’ hole. “Ready?” he asked. The young man nodded, eyes fixed on Dean. Then the dick began to push through. The muscle stretch and spread around the cock, so hungry for it. Dean bit down on his lower lip and let out a tight breath. “Fuck,” he grunted. “Oh, oh, fuck! Cas! Cas! Wait!”

“Huh?”

Dean pulled out. His mouth was open and he stared at his partner strangely. It was a look between shock and being overwhelmed. “Um. Can you turn on your hands and knees?”

“Alright,” said Cas. He did just as Dean said and pushed his ass right up into the air, back against Dean’s cock and rubbed it a little.

“This…this feels…amazing. And…and I’m going…” Dean put both hands onto Cas’ ass and spread the cheeks. His rock hard cock pushed against the hole again. “I’m going to fuck you so hard. Get ready.”

“Alright,” Cas repeated with a nod. He grasped the pillow for safety and attempted to relax despite Dean’s warning. He knew that the softer his muscles were, the better it would feel. Then Dean squeezed the ass hard and let his cock slide all the way inside.

“FUUUUCK!” Dean shouted. His voice came from the bottom of his stomach and was so loud, so deep and full of carnal rage. His dick throbbed. “Raw…raw…this is raw!”

Dean immediately began to pound into Cas’ ass. The feeling of skin on skin within the hole was so overwhelming and intoxicating to him that he was almost high. His fingers dug into Cas’ skin as his cock plowed him hard. It was amazing. So good and amazing.

“Aaah! Aaah!” Cas’ tiny whimpers went into the pillow that he flung his face into. Dean was fucking him so intensely that he couldn’t do much other than wiggle and shake as his body flushed and throbbed.

“C-come here,” Dean huffed. He wrapped his arms around Cas in an instant, one around his waist to grab his cock and the other around his torso, reaching to the opposing shoulder. He pulled Cas onto his knees so that they were sitting up with Dean’s chest to Cas’ back. Dean kissed and licked at Cas’ soft neck passionately. Their bodies rocked together, slammed together, rubbed and rubbed like animals in heat. “F-fuck…”

“It’s good,” Cas gasped. His eyes closed as he was fucked within Dean’s intense embrace.

“I-I’m gonna cum. Fuck. I’m gonna cum inside you. Pump you with my jizz.”

“Cum,” Cas moaned. Dean jerked at the young man’s cock furiously. “I-I’ll cum, too.”

“Shit, shit, shit! Cas! Cas! _Cas! Cas!_ ” Dean’s voice went from a deep, lusty groan to a strange tone. He called Cas’ name over and over, not throaty and driven but rather _desperately_. It sounded almost like a beg, as if he pleaded for Cas to make him cum. Dean had little control over his actions. His face flushed and he suddenly shot a hot load within his partner. He rammed Cas good and squeezed his dick, causing him to cum as well. Ribbons of white dripped onto the sheets. They remained on their knees, sweat sticking their bodies together.

“Ohh…ohh…Dean…Dean…”

But Dean said nothing. He kept his face nuzzling into the crook of Cas’ neck. He gasped. He groaned. Then he wiggled and began to cry.

“Dean?” Cas asked. He tried to look at his partner. “Dean? What has happened?”

“Oh, Cas,” Dean whimpered. He hugged the young man tightly, body twitching with his uncontrollable tears. His voice was a little hoarse from shouting. “Caaas…love you…”

“I love you, too, Dean. Are you sad?”

“N-no,” Dean said, shaking his head. “Aah…”

He slid his cock out of Cas’ ass and let his cum dribble out. Cas gasped lightly but was so overcome by his spastic nerves that he collapsed onto his stomach, face first into the pillow again. Dean lay next to him, on his side and put his fingers through Cas’ hair weakly.

“Oh, Cas.”

“Hm?” Cas asked tiredly. He turned on his side, too, and faced Dean with a small smile. “Is everything alright?”

“I’ve never been so happy.”

Cas nodded. “I agree. This is a new level of romance, of understanding. I think we’ve broken some barriers.”

“In more ways than one,” Dean said with a weak wink. He ran his thumb over Cas’ cheek. “We’ve got something special.”

“We do,” said Cas.

“Cas?”

“Yes?”

Dean leaned in a little closer to Cas and looked serious. “You really think it’s special, right?”

“From what I can tell, yes.”

“Then will you marry me?”

Cas’ eyes widened. “What?”

“Marry me? Will you marry me?”

Dean’s lips parted and he looked at Cas nervously. His teeth bare down together and eyes remained fixed on Cas’.

“Oh, Dean,” Cas sighed. He put his arms around Dean and began to laugh, then he moved in for a kiss. “Of course I will.”

Dean hugged Cas real tight and rolled onto his back, bringing the young man onto his chest for more and more kisses. Dean blushed and let himself cry a little more and so did Cas. They both laughed, too; Dean laughed because he had never been so happy in all of his life, and Cas laughed because he finally found a family that loved him. And they lived happily ever after.

**~*~The end~*~**

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They say that you are given two chances at family; the one you are born with and the one that you make. You have no control over the first, but the second one is your own decision.


End file.
